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I have a real hatred for men

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 14 Replies

I get they are different, and I get the differences.

But more often then not I feel true hatred.  And before anyone screams 'daddy issues' I am very close to my father.  He is the one person I have left here on Earth with whom I am truly close.

I wonder if maybe I just never met the right man?  My father, though a wonderful person and provider, is controlling.  My ex-husband is narcissistic and it's impossible to have a truly emotional and affectionate relationship with someone like that.  Now I'm 47 and I feel like my opportunities for a loving, affectionate man have passed - maybe I spent my life not know how to find that person or not being the right person that that kind of man would be attracted to?

Some days I don't care because I'm so busy raising my kids by myself and being self-reliant, and some days I feel utter despair because I feel like I'm going to spend the rest of my life alone.

Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 6, 2015 at 7:54 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jan. 6, 2015 at 8:00 AM
1 mom liked this

I don't hate them I just think they're stupid as shit.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jan. 6, 2015 at 8:14 AM

I think it's sad that you've decided that you "hate" men.  There are so many great guys in the world.  I have so many men that I love (DH, my Dad, FIL, my friends) and I couldn't imagine my life without them.  Don't shut yourself away from men because you've had some bad experiences.  Maybe you're not ready for love right now but you should explore male friendships at the very least.  :)

Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Jan. 6, 2015 at 8:15 AM
You have issues with the people you surrounded yourself with. Why blame the gender? If you have boys, they grow up knowing you hate their gender, and if you have girls they learn to blame men for the state of their lives. Maybe you need to work on yourself instead of looking to hate men.
StoicLife
by Katerina on Jan. 6, 2015 at 8:16 AM
Ahh
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Jan. 6, 2015 at 8:18 AM
Or maybe she's the problem herself. Really what person wants to be with such a negative and degrading woman? I would run.

Quoting Anonymous 3:

I think it's sad that you've decided that you "hate" men.  There are so many great guys in the world.  I have so many men that I love (DH, my Dad, FIL, my friends) and I couldn't imagine my life without them.  Don't shut yourself away from men because you've had some bad experiences.  Maybe you're not ready for love right now but you should explore male friendships at the very least.  :)

randi1978
by Murdoc's Mistress on Jan. 6, 2015 at 8:19 AM

I don't let my dislike of one or two tarnish my view of men as a whole.  I just do what I do and when the time is right, someone will fall into my lap.  Seems to happen every other time, LOL.  But seriously, don't think on it.  Don't dwell on looking for a man or worrying about how you let them all get away.  And enough with putting your issues with one or two men onto men as a whole.  It's not the fault of the entire male species. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Jan. 6, 2015 at 8:20 AM
I don't like men either. I want to stop seeing them as vile sexual predators.
Elyce225
by Emerald Member on Jan. 6, 2015 at 8:26 AM

Well, there is one common denominator here...you!

You are choosing to have these "bad" men in your life. Surround yourself with better people. Of course there are some bad men just like there are some bad women. My DH is truly the most selfless, caring, wonderful person I know. My BIL is just as amazing. My sister's FIL is too. There are some amazing men out there, you just have to give them a chance.
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Traci_Momof2
by Ruby Member on Jan. 6, 2015 at 8:36 AM

It's not the whole gender.  It's just the specific people that you know that have let you down.  You need to meet different people.  Different types of people.

I adore my husband and couldn't imagine being with anyone else.  My best friend, who is a male, is an awesome person who I feel so comfortable with.  My two boys are growing into fine young men.  I am surrounded in my life by males who are wonderful people.

Sure there are shit-bag males out there in the world.  There are also just as many shit-bag females out there in the world.  Fact is that there are shit-bag people in the world.  What you need to do is avoid the shit-bags and find the good people, regardless of what gender they are.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 6 on Jan. 6, 2015 at 8:39 AM
I hated men until I met the right one.
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