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That's it. I'm done, I'm letting exdh send ds to military school.

Posted by Anonymous
  • 14 Replies

I've just had it with ds.  I'm am at the end of my tether.

He's been talking back, lying, stealing, skipping school.  This has been going on for 2 yrs now.  I've tried discipline, rewards.  We've gone to counselling, he's had individual therapy, anger management. I've even taking classes on how to parent a difficult pre-teen.

His father and I co-parent well, we gave 50/50 custody with primary residence with me.  

During the summer I had problems with ds not coming home until the middle of the night, hanging out with a bad group of kids and smoking cigarettes and weed.  He's 14, smoking weed and staying out until 2am is not normal or healthy.

Exdh and I agreed that it would be best for ds to start the new school year in a different neighborhood, different school, different home environment.  He went to go live with his dad, sister (half sister) and step mother.  We started up family counselling with everyone involved to help with the transition.

Before Christmas break we find out ds is failing EVERY class.  And now, starting the new term, he's getting in trouble for skipping again.  When his step mother confronted him (because the school called her) he slapped her across the face and shoved her down, then ran out of the house.

I think they should have called the police, but his step mother doesn't want to press charges, she thinks it will ruin his life.

Exdh suggested we send him to military school for troubled boys.  He's researched it, and we have a meeting on Monday with the enrollment advisor.

I am feel like a failure, I am throwing in the towel.  I just don't know what else to do. Living with me didn't work, living with his father didn't help.  His sister is 7 and can't be exposed to this kind of thing.  His step mother is being assualted and has been calling her "whore" for a few months now.

I just don't know what else we CAN do at this point.

Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 14, 2015 at 4:41 PM
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Replies (1-10):
by Anonymous 2 on Jan. 14, 2015 at 4:43 PM
Best of luck! I hope things get better!!
by Anonymous 3 on Jan. 14, 2015 at 4:44 PM
1 mom liked this

sorry but you are not a failure. for some going off to military/bootcamp school is good. and it does change alot of kid's lives that might have ended up being bad adults that aren't gong anywhere.  good luck

by Anonymous 4 on Jan. 14, 2015 at 4:48 PM
I think that admitting you're done is very brave and doing something about it means you're not a failure. Letting him continue like this would be failing him and the rest of your family.
by Ruby Member on Jan. 14, 2015 at 4:50 PM
what a little shit! I'm sorry mama. I hope everything gets better for you. I'm sure he will realize what he did and he might even be thankful down the road for you sending him. Good luck
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by Platinum Member on Jan. 14, 2015 at 4:50 PM

I see you and his dad getting him the help that he needs,not failing him. Hugs

by Ruby Member on Jan. 14, 2015 at 4:51 PM
Hey you have to do what's best for HIM...and it could prove to be what he needs. Either that or he could end up in Juvenile Hall and trust me you DON'T want him there. Don't feel guilty Mama...hang in there. Good luck.
by Anonymous 5 on Jan. 14, 2015 at 4:53 PM
You did NOT fail. You are doing the best you can. He's being a shit head. And I think it's awesome you aren't slamming your ex and his SM, like I so often see on here.
by Anonymous 6 on Jan. 14, 2015 at 4:56 PM
I feel your pain. I've had silimar issues with my daughter. She is on the verge of a boot camp type of place.
by Anonymous 7 on Jan. 14, 2015 at 5:06 PM

You haven't failed and by the looks of things, he hasn't been failed by anyone other than himself. For some boys, it is the best thing that will ever happen to them.

by Silver Member on Jan. 14, 2015 at 5:08 PM
You haven't failed at all! I would do the same thing! I applaud you for doing what you know you need to. Keep standing your ground,momma.
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