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My son is choosing a far away school because he doesn't wanna live here

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 72 Replies
First of all, to make it clear, we aren't financially contributing since we can't afford it

My ds got into two great schools. One is a 25 min drive away, the other is 3 hours away. The one that isn25 mins away only guarantees housing if you're from more than 1 hour away. He instantly said he was going to the other school when he saw that..I said its pretty wasteful of money (his grandparents estate is paying) and he could live with us free

He instantly said no way, absolutely not, etc. I asked why and he said would I have a curfew and rules? I said yes, midnight and no drinking or sleepovers or being loud etc.

The school he wants is known for allowing drinking in the dorms (students are legal drinking age there) and he basically said he'd be miserable living here and having any kind of rules and a 25 min drive will hinder his social life

It hurt my feelings and I think he's being pretty stupid to be frank. Any advice on how to make him see this more logically?
Posted by Anonymous on Feb. 18, 2015 at 10:27 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Seagodess
by Emerald Member on Feb. 18, 2015 at 10:29 AM
3 moms liked this

Just drop it. I would rather live away from people who are going to tell me how to live as well. You are not paying, so you have no say.

Danesmommy1
by Grammar Enthusiast on Feb. 18, 2015 at 10:31 AM
Leave him alone. College is his chance to spread his wings and have fun. Away from y'all.

All that said, I'm noticing a theme this morning with these posts.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Feb. 18, 2015 at 10:32 AM
He sees it perfectly logically. He's an adult and wants to live on his own with his own rules. The horror!!
Krystle1216
by Gold Member on Feb. 18, 2015 at 10:32 AM
2 moms liked this
It's the college experience he's after he can't have that living with you, maybe if you considered treating him like an adult and dropped the curfew and long as he is respectful of the time he arrives he might take it better.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Feb. 18, 2015 at 10:33 AM
1 mom liked this
Support his decision, or he'll only get further and further away from you.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Feb. 18, 2015 at 10:33 AM
As long as he's not going into massive debt to do it, let him.
dandynorm
by Gold Member on Feb. 18, 2015 at 10:33 AM
You're not paying, legally he's an adult at that point, and it's his life and future that will be impacted by all this.
There's really nothing to say.
Missdameanor
by on Feb. 18, 2015 at 10:33 AM
1 mom liked this

You've got to let him fly, Mama! He will be just fine!

My dd went 3 hrs away and it was a great experience.

Did she party? Absolutely!

I know it's hard, but let him find himself without being under your wing. 

Good Luck! =)

brettsmomma
by ~Tammie~ on Feb. 18, 2015 at 10:33 AM
2 moms liked this

I want my son to move away for college. I want him to experience that growth and to be able to be totally responsible for his actions. This is go time momma!! You get to sit back and watch your hard work take fruit. <3

PPCLC
by AZ Lizard on Feb. 18, 2015 at 10:34 AM

He wants to be gone from the nest, OP. To experience life for the first time away from you.

Perfectly normal.

Let him start living that life you've helped to build the foundation on, and sit back while he makes choices you may not agree with, even the bad ones. That's part of growing up and TRULY becoming an adult--making mistakes and learning from them.

Leave him be. Support and love him, and wish him well. Your relationship with him will be better for it.

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