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How do you get along with your former MIL?

Posted by on May. 5, 2015 at 9:03 AM
  • 7 Replies
My MIL got along great until I started dating. Her son/my husband/father of my children died from melanoma in 2005. In 2011 I started dating an old friend who was divorcing. Though he was also friends with my late husband MIL had never met him. She seemed ecstatic I was dating and invited he and his children to join us for Thanksgiving dinner. That was nice but awkward for me as she's my late husbands mother. All went well. Then at my daughter's bday party 2 mos later the 2 of them dissapear. When they return my bf was acting weird. Subsequently over the next month we broke up and got back together but things were rocky. Then I spoke with my MIL and she fills me in on their conversation. My MIL ha informed him that if we married I would lose my social security benefits. I was shocked. Not her business and not her place. She was not apologetic and said it was common knowledge. I then spoke with my bf and he could see my point. Despite my MIL's interference concerning my finances my bf and I got married. Things were improving with my MIL until I made the mistake of giving her my husbands number. She then began to text him which bothered me as I already knew she couldn't be trusted. When I asked her to stop she ended her relationship with both of us but continues to text my stepchildren and my brother(no relation to her). My brother was one of the first to inform me of my former SIL babiy's birth. She is still in touch with my children (her grandchildren) as she should be. But I feel she has very much overstepped. I am trying to treat her with respect and keep her infrormed about her grandchildren but it's not been easy. Any advice?
by on May. 5, 2015 at 9:03 AM
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Replies (1-7):
.PinkSunshine.
by on May. 5, 2015 at 9:04 AM
She's dead.
MrsDavidB25
by Stacey on May. 5, 2015 at 9:06 AM

 Keep your personal life to yourself. Only deal with her when it pertains to your children.

graybealgirl
by Platinum Member on May. 5, 2015 at 9:08 AM
No clue she hated me. I hated her. Her son was very abusive. Glad I never married him
Aislin
by Platinum Member on May. 5, 2015 at 9:09 AM
Sadly, she passed away a few years ago
brettsmomma
by ~Tammie~ on May. 5, 2015 at 9:09 AM

I didnt have children in my first marriage so I have no reason to speak to her anymore. I will say I was shocked at the way she treated me during the divorce. Part of the reason I stayed married as long as I did was because I loved his family so much.We were very close for 14 years and she treated me like I was dirt at the end. I dont blame her now and see where she was coming from.

Arwyn724
by on May. 5, 2015 at 9:15 AM

I get along great with her.  She invites me to all the family stuff that my daughter is attending, holidays, birthdays, etc. Her dad & I might be divorced, but I am still aunt to My ex's nieces & nephews.

Kimppp
by Member on May. 5, 2015 at 3:17 PM
Thanks! I think you're right on how to proceed. Still very hurt

Quoting MrsDavidB25:

 Keep your personal life to yourself. Only deal with her when it pertains to your children.

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