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Life has been so good... Mother-in-law

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 26 Replies

10 years ago we moved 500+miles away from my mother-in-law.

Life has been so good. Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

She just emailed my husband and asked him to look at the house she wants to buy. It's 30 minutes from us.

When we lived that far from her before life was hell. She dropped over uninvited and unexpected all the time. She would peer into our windows and insist on seeing us every weekend she could.

To have her that close again-even the thought of it-makes my heart rate skyrocket, and not in a good way.

I'm terrified.

Posted by Anonymous on Jun. 2, 2015 at 1:11 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jun. 2, 2015 at 1:20 PM

bump

nickyjsmomma219
by Gold Member on Jun. 2, 2015 at 1:23 PM
1 mom liked this
Your husband needs to set boundaries. That is his responsibility. He needs to tell her if this move is gonna happen, there needs to be rules
yksmom
by Ruby Member on Jun. 2, 2015 at 1:23 PM
1 mom liked this
Go look at the house and tell her it's a dump that's full of safety hazards, will cost hundreds of thousands to fix, and you wouldn't let your worst enemy live there.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jun. 2, 2015 at 1:28 PM

I couldn't do it.  My husband and I had a similar situation, his mother lived less than an hour from us at one point and it was a living hell.  We almost divorced because he was fine with her bad mouthing me and intruding.  I finally told him that I couldn't do it anymore and him siding with them was killing our marriage.  He was shocked to hear my love for him was slowly dying in that situation.  We moved away not long after that.  She thought we needed to rush to see her every weekend as soon as we were off work and spend until Sunday night there.  She thought every holiday belonged exclusively to her.  If we couldn't or didn't want to come to her house, she'd show up uninvited to ours. 

What does your husband say?

Jojolily14
by Member on Jun. 2, 2015 at 1:42 PM
I couldn't do it I'd end up saying something to.her and wouldn't care how rude I sounded, if your husband won't you need to give her the wake up call she needs.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jun. 2, 2015 at 1:51 PM
This. I would do this

Quoting yksmom: Go look at the house and tell her it's a dump that's full of safety hazards, will cost hundreds of thousands to fix, and you wouldn't let your worst enemy live there.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jun. 2, 2015 at 3:11 PM


Quoting yksmom: Go look at the house and tell her it's a dump that's full of safety hazards, will cost hundreds of thousands to fix, and you wouldn't let your worst enemy live there.

That definitely wouldn't work. She's already told him she's not dead set on that particular house. :(

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jun. 2, 2015 at 4:22 PM


Quoting Anonymous 2:

I couldn't do it.  My husband and I had a similar situation, his mother lived less than an hour from us at one point and it was a living hell.  We almost divorced because he was fine with her bad mouthing me and intruding.  I finally told him that I couldn't do it anymore and him siding with them was killing our marriage.  He was shocked to hear my love for him was slowly dying in that situation.  We moved away not long after that.  She thought we needed to rush to see her every weekend as soon as we were off work and spend until Sunday night there.  She thought every holiday belonged exclusively to her.  If we couldn't or didn't want to come to her house, she'd show up uninvited to ours. 

What does your husband say?

He says it would make things a lot easier when she passes away so we wouldn't have to have the expense of traveling 500 miles to take care of all of her stuff. Ugh.

Seagodess
by Emerald Member on Jun. 2, 2015 at 4:26 PM

Tell her you know the owner and they destroyed the place and its filled with termites.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jun. 2, 2015 at 4:26 PM


Quoting Seagodess:

Tell her you know the owner and they destroyed the place and its filled with termites.

Unfortunately that won't matter. She told DH she's not dead set on that house.

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