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my ex and visitation

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 4 Replies
So my ex husband is supposed to get supervisee visits every Sunday afternoon for 4 hours. He is supposed to let me know 48 hours out where the visitation will take place and who will supervise so that I can approve it, which I do 95% of the time but there's been a few times I've said no or I've said yes with conditions. Sometimes he'll wait until Saturday and I'll still generally let him take the kids on Sunday, again I've said no before because he'd waited until after 700pm on Saturday night to notify.

For a long time he was good about taking visits. Then last year he went homeless and things were spotty until he moved in with his grandma then things were very regular again and then him and the mom of his other kid split up and he didn't have much interest again. My kids hadnt seen him since late may and he brought up in court how he hadn't seen the kids in so long. I explained it was his fault but my kids did miss him and wanted to see him again. So I text him after court and he said he did want them and we set up visitation. Fast forward to this week he has yet to get in contact with me and he only has a few hours to meet the deadline.

My question is I'm very conflicted, should I get the ball rolling again or just wait until he contacts me. Part of me says the kids like seeing their dad so I should give a gentle push but part says he knows what he's supposed to do and if he doesn't that's his problem
Posted by Anonymous on Sep. 25, 2015 at 8:31 AM
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Replies (1-4):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Sep. 25, 2015 at 8:35 AM
Personally, I would leave it up to him. I think him coming and going like that isn't good for them.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Sep. 25, 2015 at 8:36 AM
Ehh I would consider all facts. It's certainly a tough decision. Is he working? Using drugs? Maybe depressed? Back homeless?
darcibeisheim
by Gold Member on Sep. 25, 2015 at 8:58 AM
It's a tough spot. Why are is visits supervised to start with?

I tend to go more with the best interest of the kids more often than not. I would text him a reminder that the deadline for getting his visitation approved is approaching and any plans after deadline will be denied. I would deny any visits that he did not meet the required deadlines and document why you are denying the visit.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Sep. 25, 2015 at 11:51 AM
They went supervised for a few reasons. The biggest being that there were accusations that he'd been physically abusive towards the kids and physically abusive towards his gf and step mom in front the kids. I'm not denying visits, he's just not taking them and the way our co is set up I get final say about visits.

Quoting darcibeisheim: It's a tough spot. Why are is visits supervised to start with?

I tend to go more with the best interest of the kids more often than not. I would text him a reminder that the deadline for getting his visitation approved is approaching and any plans after deadline will be denied. I would deny any visits that he did not meet the required deadlines and document why you are denying the visit.
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