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Your Mainstream Kids Don't Belong Around My SN Kid

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 43 Replies
4 moms liked this

I always see these posts grumbing about SN kids in mainstream classrooms. Let me give an alternate perspective. 

I have a SN's child. She's not a behavior problem; however, she is intellectually disabled. Because she's not a behavior problem, the school is always trying to push me into mainstreaming her more and more. The gen ed teachers love her because she doesn't cause problems and she doesn't ask any questions (because she doesn't understand enough of what they're doing to even formulate a question), so she's easy to have in the classroom. Additionally, every minute she spends in a SN classroom costs the school district more money so they want her in a mainstream classroom. In fact, school districts work hard to encourage parents' to put their kids in these mainstream classrooms, so understand sometimes the SN kid is there not because of the parents or the child but because the administrators who run your school have manipulated parents into putting them in the gen ed classroom to save the district money.

Now, I always refuse any efforts to mainstream my child any more than a minimal amount. I do this for two reasons. First, she's not learning much in a gen ed classroom because it is operating at a level well above her abilities. She learns much more in a special ed classroom where she's being taught by a teacher and aides trained in special ed. Most gen ed classroom teachers have received very little training on teaching methodologies for SN kids. Second, you think a SN kid is a disruption or behavior problem? You ought to see how your neurotypical children treat my daughter. They've bullied her. They've called her "retard". They've isolated and ignored her. All because she's intellectually disabled. Frankly, I don't want my child around such ill-behaved children who lack basic empathy, making me convinced some of them are on the road to criminal behavior. When I complain to the school, I'm told, "We will talk to the kids but your daughter has to learn to accept the bigotry she will face in the world." Now, there are some kids who are very sweet to her and to the parents of those kids I say, "Kudos to you for teaching your kids to value all people regardless of intellectual capability. You're kicking ass at the parenting thing." 

For those unhappy with SN kids in the gen ed classroom, stop looking at SN kids or their parents as the problem and start looking at your school district officials who, to save a few dollars, often convince parents to put kids in mainstream classrooms who don't belong there. And, for fuck sake, teach your kid some empathy skills. 

Posted by Anonymous on Sep. 25, 2015 at 10:58 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Sep. 25, 2015 at 11:06 PM

BUMP!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Sep. 25, 2015 at 11:13 PM
It is VERY evident that most don't understand the process of getting services for a sn child. The parent does NOT walk in demanding services. The school evaluates and places the child in the services they've deemed appropriate. More often than not they're offered services that are not what the child needs, the basics is it. People who think sn parents are walking in demanding xyz out of entitlement are ridiculously wrong.

Quoting Anonymous 1:

I always see these posts grumbing about SN kids in mainstream classrooms. Let me give an alternate perspective. 

I have a SN's child. She's not a behavior problem; however, she is intellectually disabled. Because she's not a behavior problem, the school is always trying to push me into mainstreaming her more and more. The gen ed teachers love her because she doesn't cause problems and she doesn't ask any questions (because she doesn't understand enough of what they're doing to even formulate a question), so she's easy to have in the classroom. Additionally, every minute she spends in a SN classroom costs the school district more money so they want her in a mainstream classroom. In fact, school districts work hard to encourage parents' to put their kids in these mainstream classrooms, so understand sometimes the SN kid is there not because of the parents or the child but because the administrators who run your school have manipulated parents into putting them in the gen ed classroom to save the district money.

Now, I always refuse any efforts to mainstream my child any more than a minimal amount. I do this for two reasons. First, she's not learning much in a gen ed classroom because it is operating at a level well above her abilities. She learns much more in a special ed classroom where she's being taught by a teacher and aides trained in special ed. Most gen ed classroom teachers have received very little training on teaching methodologies for SN kids. Second, you think a SN kid is a disruption or behavior problem? You ought to see how your neurotypical children treat my daughter. They've bullied her. They've called her "retard". They've isolated and ignored her. All because she's intellectually disabled. Frankly, I don't want my child around such ill-behaved children who lack basic empathy, making me convinced some of them are on the road to criminal behavior. When I complain to the school, I'm told, "We will talk to the kids but your daughter has to learn to accept the bigotry she will face in the world." Now, there are some kids who are very sweet to her and to the parents of those kids I say, "Kudos to you for teaching your kids to value all people regardless of intellectual capability. You're kicking ass at the parenting thing." 

For those unhappy with SN kids in the gen ed classroom, stop looking at SN kids or their parents as the problem and start looking at your school district officials who, to save a few dollars, often convince parents to put kids in mainstream classrooms who don't belong there. And, for fuck sake, teach your kid some empathy skills. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Sep. 25, 2015 at 11:16 PM
I wish my friend were like you. She tries to keep stuffing her square peg kid into a round hole classroom and doesn't understand why everyone is so miserable and stressed. She's determined her snowflake deserves the same treatment as every other child and is making a disaster for her kid and the teachers.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Sep. 25, 2015 at 11:18 PM
I think sn children should be in a separate class. Or homeschooled. If I had a handicapped child I'd teach them myself.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Sep. 25, 2015 at 11:18 PM


Quoting Anonymous 3: I wish my friend were like you. She tries to keep stuffing her square peg kid into a round hole classroom and doesn't understand why everyone is so miserable and stressed. She's determined her snowflake deserves the same treatment as every other child and is making a disaster for her kid and the teachers.

You're blaming the wrong person. It's not her fault. It's the fault of the school. She can't demand anything. A lot of times, the school encourages the parent to mainstream the child because it's cheaper for the school district. Blame your school officials, not your friend. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Sep. 25, 2015 at 11:20 PM
1 mom liked this


Quoting Anonymous 4: I think sn children should be in a separate class. Or homeschooled. If I had a handicapped child I'd teach them myself.

It's doubtful your child would learn much being homeschooled. Teaching an intellectually disabled child or an otherwise SN child takes training. Most parents don't have that training. These kids belong in a special needs classroom. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Sep. 25, 2015 at 11:20 PM
No. The school wants her child in a special needs class. She is making noise and raising hell and demanding her kid be put in a regular class. So the school puts the kid in a regular class and all hell breaks loose. Every time someone sits down with her and explains why her kid doesn't need to be in a mainstream class, she starts screaming lawsuits and legal action and the school backs down. They WANT her kid out of the regular class.

Quoting Anonymous 1:

Quoting Anonymous 3: I wish my friend were like you. She tries to keep stuffing her square peg kid into a round hole classroom and doesn't understand why everyone is so miserable and stressed. She's determined her snowflake deserves the same treatment as every other child and is making a disaster for her kid and the teachers.

You're blaming the wrong person. It's not her fault. It's the fault of the school. She can't demand anything. A lot of times, the school encourages the parent to mainstream the child because it's cheaper for the school district. Blame your school officials, not your friend. 

redneckmama4
by Loree on Sep. 25, 2015 at 11:21 PM
Awww, I'm sorry your daughter is treated terribly. Even worse what the school says. Asshole kids bug me!

I wish you both well!
Yesihave6kids19
by on Sep. 25, 2015 at 11:21 PM
1 mom liked this
My sn son's smarter then most mainstream kids but here's a bump!
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Sep. 25, 2015 at 11:21 PM


Quoting Anonymous 2: It is VERY evident that most don't understand the process of getting services for a sn child. The parent does NOT walk in demanding services. The school evaluates and places the child in the services they've deemed appropriate. More often than not they're offered services that are not what the child needs, the basics is it. People who think sn parents are walking in demanding xyz out of entitlement are ridiculously wrong.
Quoting Anonymous 1:

I always see these posts grumbing about SN kids in mainstream classrooms. Let me give an alternate perspective. 

I have a SN's child. She's not a behavior problem; however, she is intellectually disabled. Because she's not a behavior problem, the school is always trying to push me into mainstreaming her more and more. The gen ed teachers love her because she doesn't cause problems and she doesn't ask any questions (because she doesn't understand enough of what they're doing to even formulate a question), so she's easy to have in the classroom. Additionally, every minute she spends in a SN classroom costs the school district more money so they want her in a mainstream classroom. In fact, school districts work hard to encourage parents' to put their kids in these mainstream classrooms, so understand sometimes the SN kid is there not because of the parents or the child but because the administrators who run your school have manipulated parents into putting them in the gen ed classroom to save the district money.

Now, I always refuse any efforts to mainstream my child any more than a minimal amount. I do this for two reasons. First, she's not learning much in a gen ed classroom because it is operating at a level well above her abilities. She learns much more in a special ed classroom where she's being taught by a teacher and aides trained in special ed. Most gen ed classroom teachers have received very little training on teaching methodologies for SN kids. Second, you think a SN kid is a disruption or behavior problem? You ought to see how your neurotypical children treat my daughter. They've bullied her. They've called her "retard". They've isolated and ignored her. All because she's intellectually disabled. Frankly, I don't want my child around such ill-behaved children who lack basic empathy, making me convinced some of them are on the road to criminal behavior. When I complain to the school, I'm told, "We will talk to the kids but your daughter has to learn to accept the bigotry she will face in the world." Now, there are some kids who are very sweet to her and to the parents of those kids I say, "Kudos to you for teaching your kids to value all people regardless of intellectual capability. You're kicking ass at the parenting thing." 

For those unhappy with SN kids in the gen ed classroom, stop looking at SN kids or their parents as the problem and start looking at your school district officials who, to save a few dollars, often convince parents to put kids in mainstream classrooms who don't belong there. And, for fuck sake, teach your kid some empathy skills. 

For school districts it's all about saving money. It's up to the SN parent to insist on appropriate services being provided. I do not let my school district talk me into mainstreaming any more than a minimal amount that I'm willing to accept. 

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