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I think he's losing his mind

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 13 Replies
A friend of my moms has been staying with me for 3 weeks it was only supposed to be a couple days because he's getting his bathroom redone. It's completely torn apart there is no floor and it's all dirt still.

The guys his friend(who is his POA) has working on it are taking their time. Well it's been 3 weeks and he can only stay here 14 days(i live in income based housing with my two kids).

Anyway he called at the beginning of the month and asked if he could stay a few days i said sure and figured no harm no foul. I was wrong, the first night i was up every hour helping him to and from the bathroom same thing the second night and third and fourth night. Fifth night i was kinda throwing a fit but said nothing.

He's old and has fallen 3x after hip replacement surgery twice at home and once here(that was yesterday the chair he sleeps in tipped over on him and i had to help him up yes he was still in the chair so he wasn't hurt).


Tonite really got me though i heard him get up to go to the bathroom(i'm sleeping in a chair in the living room because he snores and keeps me up) and saw the light go off after he was done. I start hearing bumping and creeking noises and it goes on for about 3 mins.

Finally he yells my name and i yell out what he waits a few mins and yells it again i pick my phone up and yell what down the hall he then yells out where am i?

I turn on my flash light and step in the bathroom. He's walking into the bath tub over and over again. So i tell him he's in the bathroom and turn on the light switch.

He said he thought he was in my room.

There have been a few other incidents too friday we were taking my dd to school and he was driving on the opposite side of the road. He's taken me to walmart and fell asleep in his car and woken up asking me where he was.


My mom keeps making excuses for him. He's even got me buttoning his shirts now. I've washed his clothes(underwear included i'm surprised he doesn't have jock itch he's had on the same underwear since he got here and they've only been washed once).

I'm ready for my house back. He's even peeing on the toilet seat.

What can i do? He has no family.



Posted by Anonymous on Oct. 26, 2015 at 1:30 AM
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Replies (1-10):
DisabledVet
by Ruby Member on Oct. 26, 2015 at 1:42 AM
1 mom liked this

Tell him he needs to stay with your mother or other friends. You don't want to lose your housing over him. Tell him you've been reported and he needs to go.

eyes4ears
by Sapphire Member on Oct. 26, 2015 at 1:49 AM
1 mom liked this
Why is your mom's friend not staying with your mom? Especially when you live in housing with strict rules.
AngelSinger
by MS Warrior on Oct. 26, 2015 at 1:52 AM
This is more than you can handle. I'd contact an agency for seniors and get some references. Good luck.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Oct. 26, 2015 at 1:59 AM
Sounds like dementia. He needs more help thank you can give him. How involved do you want to be? You could help him find resources that will help him out. I think he'd probably be better off in an assisted living facility especially with all the falls. Good luck.
amje
by Maynard's Bitch on Oct. 26, 2015 at 2:08 AM
Sounds like dementia or Alzheimer's. Your mom needs to take him in until his house is ready. One of you will have to step up and call the people who are working on his bathroom and insist that they show you how much work is done either in person or by pics with today's paper in each one so you know they are today's pictures. If his bathroom is still open dirt floor, find out why. Has he been paying them for anything (are they taking his money for nothing?) or is he to pay upon completion? Also, the man needs to see a doctor. There is something bad going on in his brain, and he might not be aware of it, and his doctor may have no clue. Someone can also call his doctor's office and ask that his doctor or the nurse set up home healthcare for this man, billed to his insurance. The two most important things are getting him to a doctor and you or your mom telling the doctor exactly what's happening so the doctor will know where to start with specialists and evaluations, and one of you also needs to do something about the ridiculous amount of time it's taking for the work crew to remodel his bathroom. There's something shady going on with that, and this guy isn't capable of understanding that or taking the steps needed to get his house finished, even if it means hiring someone different to do it and suing for his money back if he gave them any. This poor guy is your mom's friend, and you, poor dear, have aided enough as far as housing and care giving. Your mother must come and take him if he truly has absolutely no family at all.There's nothing else she can do if his stuff is packed and waiting outside on the porch with the man.You could lose your home, and you need a break from this job you sure didn't apply for! It would be nice of you to help resolve his bathroom problem and help with a doctor's visit for dementia and with making calls for home healthcare; please notice I said HELP, not do it all yourself. Good luck to you and your houseguest.
PinkButterfly66
by Diamond Member on Oct. 26, 2015 at 2:34 AM

I would start with Adult Protective services at social services.  It sounds like he has dementia and probably needs to be in a nursing home.  The folks at Adult Protective services should investigate what the heck is going on in his bathroom renovation too.  

Peaceful.chaos
by Emerald Member on Oct. 26, 2015 at 2:38 AM
Sounds like he needs to professional help.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 26, 2015 at 3:01 AM
He can't get up the steps my apartment is handicap accessible and one level. I've tried talking to him he's so stubborn he won't listen. He had hip replacement surgery(i posted about him coming to stay right after he asked) and honestly it's wearing me out. I feel like i have 3 kids not two.

He's done a lot for me over the years from taking me to school to making sure i get to all my appointments. I've started thinking alzhimers is setting in.

His mom and dad are dead and so is his brother. His friend thats over his money i believe is slowly bleeding him dry the first time i laid eyes on this guy he gave me dirty looks and never said a word to me.

Quoting eyes4ears: Why is your mom's friend not staying with your mom? Especially when you live in housing with strict rules.
eyes4ears
by Sapphire Member on Oct. 26, 2015 at 8:45 AM
I got the feeling that dementia was setting in from your post. He needs to see a doctor about that. Can you go to the courts or attorney General to have the money overseer investigated and removed?

Quoting Anonymous 1: He can't get up the steps my apartment is handicap accessible and one level. I've tried talking to him he's so stubborn he won't listen. He had hip replacement surgery(i posted about him coming to stay right after he asked) and honestly it's wearing me out. I feel like i have 3 kids not two.

He's done a lot for me over the years from taking me to school to making sure i get to all my appointments. I've started thinking alzhimers is setting in.

His mom and dad are dead and so is his brother. His friend thats over his money i believe is slowly bleeding him dry the first time i laid eyes on this guy he gave me dirty looks and never said a word to me.

Quoting eyes4ears: Why is your mom's friend not staying with your mom? Especially when you live in housing with strict rules.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 26, 2015 at 8:53 AM
Idk i tired talking to him this morning about the company working on his house they still haven't gotten to his bathroom and he's spent nearly $30,000 maybe more already. He says there is nothing he can do because his friend is POA i told him oh yes there is your alive and in your right mind say something.

Quoting eyes4ears: I got the feeling that dementia was setting in from your post. He needs to see a doctor about that. Can you go to the courts or attorney General to have the money overseer investigated and removed?

Quoting Anonymous 1: He can't get up the steps my apartment is handicap accessible and one level. I've tried talking to him he's so stubborn he won't listen. He had hip replacement surgery(i posted about him coming to stay right after he asked) and honestly it's wearing me out. I feel like i have 3 kids not two.

He's done a lot for me over the years from taking me to school to making sure i get to all my appointments. I've started thinking alzhimers is setting in.

His mom and dad are dead and so is his brother. His friend thats over his money i believe is slowly bleeding him dry the first time i laid eyes on this guy he gave me dirty looks and never said a word to me.

Quoting eyes4ears: Why is your mom's friend not staying with your mom? Especially when you live in housing with strict rules.
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