Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

child has food allergies, non custodial dad says I'm making it all up and feeds kid whatever he wants

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 20 Replies
This issue has come up before but I thought we had finally taken care of it. My youngest son has dairy allergies, thank goodness he has slower onset which although unpleasant has never caused a life threatening reaction. It has caused many problems though. He can't even have baked in dairy or his eczema flares up and he vomits or has diarrhea with or without blood.

My ex husband gets supervised visits 4 hours on Sundays and swears I'm making it up. Funny how we were still married when he was diagnosed and he landed in the hospital because he wouldn't gain weight because of this and had to do pt and ot for poor muscle development because of his allergies. Things run smoothly when he doesn't have dairy (or a few other less major things).

Well my 3 year old asked me for cheese last night with his chili. I said no you can't have it and my older son tells me dad has been feeding brother dairy and "other bad stuff". I suspected as much because he's really broke out and had green diarrhea all week.

I don't even know what to do. I can deny his choice of supervisor but we don't get along well enough for me to supervise either. I don't even know what to do at this point
Posted by Anonymous on Oct. 29, 2015 at 3:45 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
bluebunnybabe
by kid crack dealer on Oct. 29, 2015 at 11:45 PM
It's four hours, can't you feed the kids before they go & tell them not to eat there?
helen491
by Silver Member on Oct. 29, 2015 at 11:48 PM
1 mom liked this
Get your medical documents together. If the supervisor isnt doing his job go to his boss.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Oct. 29, 2015 at 11:51 PM
Get over it and supervise for 4 hours. I'm allergic to dairy too and the slightest bit makes me sick as a dog. I can sympathise with your little guy.
Polkadotted
by Bronze Member on Oct. 29, 2015 at 11:54 PM

BM got into trouble for doing that, but she was still being supervised by CPS at that point.  One of the reasons her visits are still supervised.

fallenangel_353
by Ruby Member on Oct. 29, 2015 at 11:55 PM
Men. They just don't get it sometimes. My sister has even shoved papers in her husband's face from the pediatrician showing all the food allergies that my niece has. Like results from testing and stuff. My bil refuses to aknowledge it. My niece has none that would cause her to be deathly ill or anything. But still.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 30, 2015 at 9:12 AM
I always feed them before they go but they're going to take food if offered and my son is only 3 so he doesn't 100% understand he can't eat everything

Quoting bluebunnybabe: It's four hours, can't you feed the kids before they go & tell them not to eat there?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 30, 2015 at 9:13 AM
Usually its his family that supervises. Who knows what he's told then about the allergies and since the onset usually takes 12 hours to start they're not seeing the effects

Quoting helen491: Get your medical documents together. If the supervisor isnt doing his job go to his boss.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 30, 2015 at 9:15 AM
I can hack it but I'm afraid it'll be a lot of tension for the kids and the ex has an explosive temper and the kids don't need to see him blow up because I'm there.

Quoting Anonymous 2: Get over it and supervise for 4 hours. I'm allergic to dairy too and the slightest bit makes me sick as a dog. I can sympathise with your little guy.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 30, 2015 at 9:18 AM
Right now its just "a supervisor approved by mother" and I'm trying to make sure the kids have some type of relationship with their dad

Quoting Polkadotted:

BM got into trouble for doing that, but she was still being supervised by CPS at that point.  One of the reasons her visits are still supervised.

lancet98
by Ruby Member on Oct. 30, 2015 at 9:22 AM

Tell the court.

And by the way, infants with food intolerance problems (they're not allergies) often grow out of them.  Maybe not as a 3 year old, but later on.  Also, it is usually possible if the child has a lactose problem, to simply give him an over the counter medication so he can have dairy without problems.  If the court won't back you up (they may if the child was hospitalized for these issues), the child may be given this medication.   And since the court may be slow to act you could possibly deal with it temporarily this way.

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)