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BM is upset that I'm raising her kids at our house.

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 173 Replies
My dh and I have been together for 3&1/2 years, I have 3 kids (9, 7, & 5) and he has 2 (9 & 6). He and BM share 50/50 custody, alternating one week here and one week there. I am a teacher at the kids' school, that's actually how dh and I met. BM really liked me as her child's teacher but once the year was over and dh and I started dating she didn't really care for me as much. She was nice enough at first but things have gone downhill. She is upset because dh and I are now married (6 months) and she hates that I'm around her kids as much as she is, her words not mine. I love her kids, I loved her oldest when she was my student and I love them both even more now that they're my step children. The biggest problem she has is that dh works a lot so I do most of the child related things around the house when they are with us. My dh works from 6am-6pm, but usually doesn't get off till 6:30pm in actuality, 6 days a week; so he's gone every Mon-Sat from about 5:45am-7pm. On our weeks I take all the kids with me in the morning to school and we all go home together when I'm done after school. The kids' bedtime is 8:30 on school nights and 9-9:30 on weekends so dh spends as much time as he can with them in the evenings before they go to bed buy Sundays are when we have most of our family time.
Would you be mad at dh and me or dislike me if you were BM? I love her kids and treat them the same as my own, they are never left out and always treated equally with my own bio children. She thinks they should be with her more since dh isn't around every minute the kids are there. I would think she would be happy they have a step mom that loves and cares for them and a dad who works so hard to provide for them. I know if my kids' dad was actually around or involved I'd hope for a loving step mom if he ever found a woman to be with.

Eta: Idk what happened to my paragraphs, they went away when I posted for some reason.
Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 23, 2016 at 12:06 PM
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Replies (1-10):
vegaswife2011
by LMAO on Jan. 23, 2016 at 12:09 PM
11 moms liked this
I would be thankful that you loved and took care of my kids.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 23, 2016 at 12:13 PM
1 mom liked this
That's how I think I would feel too.

Quoting vegaswife2011: I would be thankful that you loved and took care of my kids.
tklrcl2014
by Platinum Member on Jan. 23, 2016 at 12:13 PM

As long as you weren't the "other woman" and y'all didn't get together until after we were divorced I wouldn't mind you as long as you didn't step on mom toes and were good to my kids.

mom2devin11005
by Silver Member on Jan. 23, 2016 at 12:15 PM

No I would not dislike you... I would be greatful my children had someone that was there to care for and love them.

Now I am saying this not having any experience being in the situation but I would like to think I could be grown up enough to be greatful  that while my kids would be at the other parents house they have someone that treats them as they do their own kids. 

Good luck and I hope BM eventually comes around so you guys can all be great parents for the kids

SexyTeacher
by Silver Member on Jan. 23, 2016 at 12:15 PM

No, I would not be mad. I don't know why some BM's are mad at SM's.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jan. 23, 2016 at 12:15 PM

bump

Crymsm
by Platinum Member on Jan. 23, 2016 at 12:16 PM
1 mom liked this
Well that's reality with these things and she should accept that
morgiefae
by on Jan. 23, 2016 at 12:18 PM
I would not be mad, I would be greatfun they are with someone that loves them, and is family over being at a babysitter etc...
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jan. 23, 2016 at 12:20 PM
Maybe during the time he is unavailable to them he should ask her if she wants more time.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 23, 2016 at 12:20 PM
Oh no, they had already been officially divorced for some time before I was even his oldest child's teacher and we didn't even start dating until the summer after I had her in my class.

Quoting tklrcl2014:

As long as you weren't the "other woman" and y'all didn't get together until after we were divorced I wouldn't mind you as long as you didn't step on mom toes and were good to my kids.

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