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I just don't love him the same...

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 6 Replies
We have had my SS's best friend living with is Thursday-Sunday every week for about 6 months. Almost as much as SS is here.

They are 8 years old.

I have loved and treated him just exactly the same as my own every day that hear here. Disciplined. Given medical care. Done school work. Helped him earn his yellow belt. Gotten him all the way through basketball season. And paid for so many things. And I do truly love him. Because he has been such a. Huge part of our lives.

His dad died suddenly 6 months ago and his mother had to take a second (night shift) job. Just to be able to support him and pay the bills. She is exhausted and we are doing everything we can to help.

But as much as o have grown to love him I realized it doesn't even compare to how much I love my own kids. and I feel so bad for that.

Yesterday while we were at little league tournament I left with my twins to go change their diapers. When I got back DH and told me he sent the boys to the car for something. About 1.5 miles away.

The boys ended up gone 2 hours and I was so totally panicked. And when we finally found them (they had gotten lost on the way Back) I started to cry from relief. I just grabbed SS and looked at him and held him and hugged him and cried. But I had to remind myself to be relieved to see the other boy too.

I realized that no matter how special the other child is, no matter how much we love him, it's just not the same. My kids are my kids. And I feel really guilty that I felt so little for that kid when I thought he was in just as much danger as SS. All that mattered to me was find SS and seeing that he was ok.

Posted by Anonymous on Mar. 13, 2016 at 4:39 AM
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Replies (1-6):
Slf2036
by Bronze Member on Mar. 13, 2016 at 4:44 AM
Don't beat yourself up about it. I think that's normal and kind of why being a mom is so special. It doesn't mean you don't love him right, it's just nothing compares to a mothers love. You can't help that.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 13, 2016 at 12:41 PM
Thanks

Quoting Slf2036: Don't beat yourself up about it. I think that's normal and kind of why being a mom is so special. It doesn't mean you don't love him right, it's just nothing compares to a mothers love. You can't help that.
januaryqueen
by Platinum Member on Mar. 13, 2016 at 7:01 PM
Not something to feel bad about. You carried and gave birth to your own. No other bond can compare with that bond. You're already showing more love and compassion for that little boy than many other women would show.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 13, 2016 at 7:12 PM
Well I didn't really give birth to my stepson... But I guess I get what you're saying.

Quoting januaryqueen: Not something to feel bad about. You carried and gave birth to your own. No other bond can compare with that bond. You're already showing more love and compassion for that little boy than many other women would show.
Kmakksmom
by Stefanie on Mar. 13, 2016 at 7:19 PM
We've had two of our oldest daughter's best friends living here since the beginning of January. One has a mom who's been in TX (we live in WA) taking care of her parents and her mom didn't want to take her out of school for the 6+ months she will be gone, and the other girl is homeless who's family isn't around. They are both 17. Our oldest will be 17 in June.

I can definitely relate to what you are saying.
corticosteroid
by Sapphire Member on Mar. 13, 2016 at 7:22 PM

I'm not sure what your point is supposed to be here...

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