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Incest

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 39 Replies

When we were kids, my father molested me and my siblings.  We were also used in children's porn.  It was a horrible childhood.

My siblings and I struggle to have a relationship.  The things we were made to do together were horrendous and as awful as it may sound, at times each of us would pretend to be ill or blame the other for something that happended at the house so that they would be chosen that day instead of another.

I want us to heal and be a family again, but I don't know how.  I am the baby of the family and my sibs have all moved on and have distanced themselves and don't seem to want to look back.  I feel so alone.

Posted by Anonymous on Mar. 13, 2016 at 3:22 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Mar. 13, 2016 at 3:44 PM
Reach out to your siblings. Have you been able to process these traumas and move forward? How old are you?
Ted1242
by I'm listening. on Mar. 13, 2016 at 3:45 PM
Wow.
blue.butterfly
by on Mar. 13, 2016 at 3:45 PM
OMG. I don't even know what to say. :(
theResidentCat
by on Mar. 13, 2016 at 3:47 PM
3 moms liked this

I would recommend seeing a therapist to help you with this journey.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 13, 2016 at 3:49 PM

I am 24.  My siblings are 36, 35, 33, 30, 28, & 27.  I have a little contact with the 3 younger ones.  Not even sure where my 35 year old sister is.  When she left the home I was only 5 or 6 and I never saw her again.  

I manage.  I have a decent life now and will do everything in my power to give my kids a better life.

Quoting Anonymous 2: Reach out to your siblings. Have you been able to process these traumas and move forward? How old are you?


TisHerself
by Platinum Member on Mar. 13, 2016 at 3:49 PM

You can't force healing, or family wholeness on any of them - you can only work on your own peace. 

Find it, express your interest in the family's healing, then let each of them continue on their own path. 

Healing thoughts your way. 

andreamarie
by Platinum Member on Mar. 13, 2016 at 3:50 PM
I am so sorry. As The resident cat said. I would go for professional help.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 13, 2016 at 3:51 PM

I'm afraid bringing in an outsider may make it more difficult with my siblings.  We have learned to not trust outsiders and just handle things on our own.

Quoting theResidentCat:

I would recommend seeing a therapist to help you with this journey.


theResidentCat
by on Mar. 13, 2016 at 3:52 PM
3 moms liked this

Your siblings also need to see a therapist. We are not built to know how to deal with these types of things. It is beyond our ability. This is why they have therapists. To help us exercise through shame, hurt, resentment, and to heal.

Quoting Anonymous 1:

I'm afraid bringing in an outsider may make it more difficult with my siblings.  We have learned to not trust outsiders and just handle things on our own.

Quoting theResidentCat:

I would recommend seeing a therapist to help you with this journey.



Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Mar. 13, 2016 at 3:52 PM
I had a broken childhood- not as bad as yours. For some of your siblings being around each other reminds them of the abuse and is too painful. It's a survival mechanism; fight or flight. You guys are scarred. As painful as it is, you need to accept how they feel and try to move on. Seek therapy.
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