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Un invite him!

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 140 Replies
My DH has a brother who's in his 30s and still lives at home with mommy. He doesn't hold a job down for long and any money he gets goes for beer. This idiot has been arrested TWENTY SEVEN times for drunk driving and because mommy pays for a lawyer he's gotten off each and every time.

He's incredibly rude to mil. He curses at her and orders her around. It's pathetic on both of their parts in all honesty.

Overall he's just not a good person and not someone I want around our children and I've done a really good job of keeping him away from them. I don't want my children thinking it's ok to speak and treat another person the way BIL treats his mother.

If you speak to BIL about his behavior he physically assaults you, granted he's never touched me he has assaulted his brothers and sister when they stick up for their mom.

DH and I have spoken about his brother several times and because they live several hours away it's never been an issue, we just don't go to his mother's house if his brother is there.

Well DH invited his mother and step father along with his brother to Easter dinner because they are apparently a package deal.

I am perfectly ok with his mother and step father coming but not his brother. My family will be here as well and I refuse to be embarrassed by his brother and I do not want to subject our children to that sort of behavior either.

DH doesn't want to tell his brother no because he knows it will cause a fight and his mom won't come, and did I mention his mother has terminal cancer? I understand he wants to see his mom and I will never stop him from seeing her but I do not want his brother here. Period.

I suggested we do an Easter lunch Saturday at his moms house and leave the kids here, DH rejected it because his mom wants to see the kids.

I don't know what to do. The second BIL starts ordering MIL around or cursing at her it's going to cause problems here and I want to avoid that at all costs.

Speaking to BIL ahead of time won't help, it will just set him off.

Any suggestions? I'm tempted to give my family a heads up and then feign a stomach bug Sunday to get out of this mess.

Posted by Anonymous on Mar. 22, 2016 at 4:22 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Mar. 22, 2016 at 4:24 PM

Oh that sucks........

i am not sure how he has gotten off 27 times....

maybe if you have to be around him be OVERLY nice, kill him with kindness and shove him out the door!!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Mar. 22, 2016 at 4:25 PM
That's a tough spot to be in. What does his step dad do when bil treats his mom like that?
crazyjenn
by 🏈FootballGirl🏈 on Mar. 22, 2016 at 4:26 PM
5 moms liked this
Being that his mother has terminal cancer, and wants to see her grandchildren, I would say, suck it up, it's one day.
Inana
by Controversial on Mar. 22, 2016 at 4:26 PM
3 moms liked this
Good grief!! Tell your family what to expect and ask them to help remove him if shtf. Or tell dh to talk to his parents about not bringing bil or you'll do it for him.
astheworldspins
by Platinum Member on Mar. 22, 2016 at 4:26 PM
Yeah, I couldn't and wouldn't deal with that. I would never allow, thankfully neither would my dh, someone like that in our home.
Supercrazy101
by Silver Member on Mar. 22, 2016 at 4:27 PM
I'd threaten him once he acted up in MY house.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 22, 2016 at 4:27 PM
I don't want the inevitable fist fight to break out here. Every stinking time BIL starts a physical fight.

Quoting crazyjenn: Being that his mother has terminal cancer, and wants to see her grandchildren, I would say, suck it up, it's one day.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 22, 2016 at 4:28 PM
Nothing!!!!! He freaking pretends he doesn't hear it. It's incredibly sad.

Quoting Anonymous 3: That's a tough spot to be in. What does his step dad do when bil treats his mom like that?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 22, 2016 at 4:29 PM
The thing is I could see him punching me if I told him to knock it off.

He's that unstable.

Quoting Supercrazy101: I'd threaten him once he acted up in MY house.
Spare.Time
by Emerald Member on Mar. 22, 2016 at 4:29 PM
3 moms liked this

Let mil, fil, bil come on Saturday. Have dh tell bil and mil that the very first time bil steps out of line they will be told to leave.  Again have dh tell mil it would be better if bil stayed home.

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