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My ex and my baby :-(

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 4 Replies
My ex and I were never married and never had living children. I had a still born baby boy who would have been 10 this year. I ruined the relationship due to depression after the stillborn and I completely pushed him away. I ended up breaking up with him, moving 2 hours away back in with my parents, and didn't leave my bedroom for months because of my depression. Once I got a job I was able to get back to normal but I completely cut off my ex. He would call me often but I just couldn't bring myself to go back to that place, I was very selfish. I met dh a couple years later and we got married then had 2 beautiful boys. I still get depressed around my babies birthday which is tomorrow. I started talking to my ex once a year at this time after dh and I got together, it was his idea. Dh has never gone through this before and it surprisingly does help a lot to talk to him. My ex is an amazing guy and once a year I wish that I had been stronger and less selfish because I feel like we could have stayed together. After we stop talking those thoughts go away, I am always thankful that I met dh and had my boys and I wouldn't trade them for the world. I would never cheat on dh and my ex would never allow that either (they talk also for a little bit) he is still hours away and I only feel this way once a year when we talk. I have definitely gotten better with dealing with my babies death and on his birthday I am not nearly as depressed as I used to be. I still cry but I am so much better than I used to be. I can't believe I would have had a 10 year old running around tomorrow, I love my baby boy! I just wanted to get that out, I don't think I will ever get over his death but I have been coping much better.
Posted by Anonymous on Mar. 22, 2016 at 8:31 PM
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Replies (1-4):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Mar. 22, 2016 at 8:35 PM
I'm glad that you're getting better. I can't even begin to imagine what that would do to me. I'm glad you're DH is understanding of your healing process.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Mar. 22, 2016 at 8:37 PM
Hugs
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 22, 2016 at 8:38 PM
I got really lucky meeting my dh, he's amazing

Quoting Anonymous 2: I'm glad that you're getting better. I can't even begin to imagine what that would do to me. I'm glad you're DH is understanding of your healing process.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 22, 2016 at 8:52 PM
Thank you

Quoting Anonymous 3: Hugs
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