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HELP - I NEED A GOOD JOKE...... fast!

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 10 Replies

dd is filling out her application for high school student government and the last question is "tell us a joke".  Know any good (appropriate) jokes?

Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 20, 2016 at 11:52 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Apr. 20, 2016 at 11:54 PM
Sorry, all I can think of is your momma & go look in a mirror. Here's a bump though lol.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Apr. 20, 2016 at 11:56 PM
Patient: I don't like back stories

Doctor: so, tell me how we got here

Patient: AHHHHHH!

Don't use that. It's from ds' book. He's been going around saying that so it's stuck in my head.

but here's a jokeless bump for you.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 20, 2016 at 11:56 PM
1 mom liked this

this is the one I told her....

it is hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally.

DarksMama
by Ruby Member on Apr. 20, 2016 at 11:57 PM

Wow...most of my stuff is blue. VERY blue. lol

cheekacheeka
by Emerald Member on Apr. 20, 2016 at 11:58 PM

Where do generals keep their armies?





In their sleevies!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Apr. 21, 2016 at 12:08 AM
1 mom liked this

Two thirds of a pun is P U, and that one stinks!  I'll admit, I laughed more than I should have.

Ok, so an appropriate joke, huh? 

A woman noticed her husband standing on the bathroom scale, sucking in his stomach. “Ha­­! That’s not going to help,” she said.

“Sure, it does,” he said. “It’s the only way I can see the numbers.”

Quoting Anonymous 1:

this is the one I told her....

it is hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally.


madamlunna213
by Silver Member on Apr. 21, 2016 at 12:14 AM
One morning a little boy surprised his grandma by bringing her a cup of coffee, as she forced down the last sip she was surprised to see three little green army men in the bottom of the cup. The little boy piped up with You know the best part of waking up Is soldiers in your cup
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 21, 2016 at 12:17 AM

That is soooo cute... but i doubt the kids in hs will remember that commercial.

Quoting madamlunna213: One morning a little boy surprised his grandma by bringing her a cup of coffee, as she forced down the last sip she was surprised to see three little green army men in the bottom of the cup. The little boy piped up with You know the best part of waking up Is soldiers in your cup


Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 21, 2016 at 12:18 AM

the joke I told made me lol because so many of these kids use literally literally all the time.

Quoting Anonymous 4:

Two thirds of a pun is P U, and that one stinks!  I'll admit, I laughed more than I should have.

Ok, so an appropriate joke, huh? 

A woman noticed her husband standing on the bathroom scale, sucking in his stomach. “Ha­­! That’s not going to help,” she said.

“Sure, it does,” he said. “It’s the only way I can see the numbers.”

Quoting Anonymous 1:

this is the one I told her....

it is hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Apr. 21, 2016 at 12:21 AM

Mobile Photo

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