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If your mother called you out...(rant)

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 19 Replies
On social media, of all places, how would you feel? I don't post anything on social media at all (cafemom being the exception, obviously) so this really ticked me off. Long story short:

We don't talk. Haven't for about 3 years. My choice. The effort and fakery/fuckery became too much. I moved out her home and in to other family members house in highschool. She's seen the kids, but not me, that's the best I can do. She decides to write a Happy Birthday post (saw it through mutual friends) and said she wished we could spend time together and that one day I will learn to let the little stuff go and it isn't important...

Well, mother, maybe it is little to you, but it's not for me. You made it clear several times from school age on up that I was not wanted. Your mental abuse and drinking left me with depression, anxiety, ptsd, and years of trying to learn to cope with these issues. You made me feel worthless, ugly, and unwanted, but yet you pretend as nothing ever happened and you have no clue as to way your daughter got sick and tired of your foolishness. And if you think your little "woe is me" post will guilt me in to talking to, well think again. You pretty much just put the nail in the coffin. Don't hate you, just don't want to deal with you! I don't know what it was that you went through that made you so bitter towards me, but what I do know is that while I may not be a perfect parent, I would never blame my children for any bad decision that I MADE. They didn't ask to be here and I refuse to act like they did or that they forced their way in to my life with out my permission.

That list only scratches the surface but to anyone who suffered abuse, whether mental, physical, or emotional, I realize things could have been much worse for me and compared to others my back ground may pale in comparison. Just sharing my frustration from my situation. I am blessed that I had options and didn't have to spend the rest of my minor years in turmoil.
Posted by Anonymous on May. 8, 2016 at 4:03 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Spare.Time
by Emerald Member on May. 8, 2016 at 4:08 PM

There are no perfect parents.  We all make mistakes.  
You've made a decision regarding your mother.
It's no one else's business.
You don't have to explain your decision to anyone.   

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 8, 2016 at 4:13 PM
Thanks. That's how I feel about it. I just felt it was a low blow for her to post something like that, but I'm just going to try and file away in the back of my mind and keep pushing foward.

Quoting Spare.Time:

There are no perfect parents.  We all make mistakes.  You've made a decision regarding your mother. It's no one else's business.You don't have to explain your decision to anyone.   

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on May. 8, 2016 at 6:57 PM
Delete and block, so you don't have to see it anymore.
I'm soo happy my mother is basically computer illiterate, that sounds like something she would post.
She's probably not fooling anyone but herself.
shell3m
by Shell on May. 8, 2016 at 7:00 PM
1 mom liked this
I'd delete the post and then block her.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on May. 8, 2016 at 7:01 PM
Right now you are giving her your time/energy/emotion in this post which I'm sure could be better spent elsewhere. I haven't had contact with my father in 20 years (since I was 25) so I get it. Its freeing to let it go.
PinkButterfly66
by Sapphire Member on May. 8, 2016 at 7:03 PM
1 mom liked this

I would air all her dirty laundry out for all of facebook to see.  I would list all the 'little stuff' that she wants you to just let go.  I wouldn't put up with that passive aggressive shit.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 8, 2016 at 7:17 PM
You're right, which is why I try to ignore anything she says or does to anyone else about me. As much as I dislike that she did that, I'm mire upset with my self for letting it affect me in the first place 😳

Quoting Anonymous 3: Right now you are giving her your time/energy/emotion in this post which I'm sure could be better spent elsewhere. I haven't had contact with my father in 20 years (since I was 25) so I get it. Its freeing to let it go.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on May. 8, 2016 at 7:20 PM
Go easy on yourself. Just re-focus your attention on whats good in your life and on the opprtunity you've been given to have an amazing mother-child relationship with your own children. 😊

Quoting Anonymous 1: You're right, which is why I try to ignore anything she says or does to anyone else about me. As much as I dislike that she did that, I'm mire upset with my self for letting it affect me in the first place 😳

Quoting Anonymous 3: Right now you are giving her your time/energy/emotion in this post which I'm sure could be better spent elsewhere. I haven't had contact with my father in 20 years (since I was 25) so I get it. Its freeing to let it go.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 8, 2016 at 7:21 PM
There have been sssooo many times that I have wanted to tell her exactly how everything she did affected me. I would write or type a long letter, detailing every memory, but when I'm done I always end up tearing it up or deleting it. Part of me just doesn't have it in me to stoop to her level, the other part feels it would be a waste of time and energy because knowing her memoryy will get selective very quickly.

Quoting PinkButterfly66:

I would air all her dirty laundry out for all of facebook to see.  I would list all the 'little stuff' that she wants you to just let go.  I wouldn't put up with that passive aggressive shit.

PinkButterfly66
by Sapphire Member on May. 8, 2016 at 7:23 PM

Then block her and cut her out of your life completely.

Quoting Anonymous 1: There have been sssooo many times that I have wanted to tell her exactly how everything she did affected me. I would write or type a long letter, detailing every memory, but when I'm done I always end up tearing it up or deleting it. Part of me just doesn't have it in me to stoop to her level, the other part feels it would be a waste of time and energy because knowing her memoryy will get selective very quickly.
Quoting PinkButterfly66:

I would air all her dirty laundry out for all of facebook to see.  I would list all the 'little stuff' that she wants you to just let go.  I wouldn't put up with that passive aggressive shit.


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