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summer boredom

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 35 Replies
One boy, 10 years old, single child. Most of his friends come from a divorced household so half the summer, the weekends, he has no one to play with bc they're gone.

Sometimes, I'd like to be by myself. I have social anxiety so even being around my own child causes me to have issues if I don't have alone time, causes my panic attacks.

I don't want him on his tablet or playing the Xbox all day and night long. I'd like for him to get some summer reading done (not a school requirement but it'd be nice, I feel)... but what else? I can tell him to go to the park but he comes back within minutes and says he doesn't know anyone at the park.

In the end, I feel like his days are spent inside, in the basement in front of one electronic or another. I'd like to stop that, but I don't want to be his best friend, doing EVERYTHING with him bc he has no one else.

Summer camp isn't an option.
Posted by Anonymous on May. 30, 2016 at 8:54 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 30, 2016 at 8:56 PM
He's been on the tablet or Xbox since Friday at 9pm, until 10... Saturday from noon until 1am (on Sunday). Woke up Sunday, was on that. I got him to read for about 20 minutes. Today, he's been up since 8am, and other than when I made him get off his tablet for a few minutes to eat, he's been on that.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on May. 30, 2016 at 8:58 PM
1 mom liked this

Bummer.

What is he interested in? Chemistry? Science experiments? Maybe get him a cool activity book or something. My DS 11 likes doing stuff like that. Make up a scavenger hunt for him. Pay him for chores around the house. Drop him off at a movie theater for a matinee. 

Ultimately you're his mother despite your anxiety. The poor kid has no one to play with and nothing to do and you just want him to leave you alone. That isn't terribly fair, so you may need to just work on you a bit this summer, too. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 30, 2016 at 9:08 PM
He's interested in playing video games and watching YouTube. That's it. I swear.

And I know it sounds horrible but if I don't get that alone time, I get antsy and start... getting mean. We still spend time together, or at least try to... but he didn't want to cook out with me, getting him to help clean is a PITA. He wanted to do smores so I set up the fire, got everything... he ate 3 and left (to watch YouTube) so I'm out here sitting with the fire.

He doesn't like going outside so if I'm in the garden, he's watching YouTube or playing the game. I can't do either of those (will cause seizures. I don't even like watching tv).

He has a list of chores he can do to earn money. He did good for about a month but then said he didn't care about the money.

Next week, I'll have money for a membership for the pool.

He throws these mini fits when I invite him to do something else, like grocery shopping (he'll go but he'll ask to buy a bunch of crap and i have to say no), or play chess- well, if I play chess then I can stay up until 11 and play the Xbox. Uh, no.

Quoting Anonymous 2:

Bummer.

What is he interested in? Chemistry? Science experiments? Maybe get him a cool activity book or something. My DS 11 likes doing stuff like that. Make up a scavenger hunt for him. Pay him for chores around the house. Drop him off at a movie theater for a matinee. 

Ultimately you're his mother despite your anxiety. The poor kid has no one to play with and nothing to do and you just want him to leave you alone. That isn't terribly fair, so you may need to just work on you a bit this summer, too. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on May. 30, 2016 at 9:12 PM
I saw a really awesome check list of things for kids to do before they get on an electronic such as read for 30 minutes, do 3 chores, help a family member, play outside for 30 minutes, do something artistic. It might help.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 30, 2016 at 9:16 PM
I've tried the reading thing- whatever you read, you play double that time. Like 30 minutes reading means an hour on the Xbox. But he'll sneak the stuff, mainly the tablet and still won't bother to read. Or he'll try to read baby books (think run Jane run).

I feel wrong taking away the tablet or Xbox bc half the time, that's where his friends are. And I know that's what he's craving and missing- hanging out with his friends... but I feel like the dependency on the electronics have gotten to be too much.

Quoting Anonymous 3: I saw a really awesome check list of things for kids to do before they get on an electronic such as read for 30 minutes, do 3 chores, help a family member, play outside for 30 minutes, do something artistic. It might help.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on May. 30, 2016 at 9:17 PM

Well, the good thing about being a parent is that you can just tell him that he HAS to do some other things. lol

Tell him this isn't a barter system. Mine tries to make deals, too. I just tell him no. He would be on the computer all day if I let him, too. I just tell him he needs to get off and find something else do to. Go outside. I don't care if you just sit on the deck, go outside (he always finds something, though). 

Quoting Anonymous 1: He's interested in playing video games and watching YouTube. That's it. I swear. And I know it sounds horrible but if I don't get that alone time, I get antsy and start... getting mean. We still spend time together, or at least try to... but he didn't want to cook out with me, getting him to help clean is a PITA. He wanted to do smores so I set up the fire, got everything... he ate 3 and left (to watch YouTube) so I'm out here sitting with the fire. He doesn't like going outside so if I'm in the garden, he's watching YouTube or playing the game. I can't do either of those (will cause seizures. I don't even like watching tv). He has a list of chores he can do to earn money. He did good for about a month but then said he didn't care about the money. Next week, I'll have money for a membership for the pool. He throws these mini fits when I invite him to do something else, like grocery shopping (he'll go but he'll ask to buy a bunch of crap and i have to say no), or play chess- well, if I play chess then I can stay up until 11 and play the Xbox. Uh, no.
Quoting Anonymous 2:

Bummer.

What is he interested in? Chemistry? Science experiments? Maybe get him a cool activity book or something. My DS 11 likes doing stuff like that. Make up a scavenger hunt for him. Pay him for chores around the house. Drop him off at a movie theater for a matinee. 

Ultimately you're his mother despite your anxiety. The poor kid has no one to play with and nothing to do and you just want him to leave you alone. That isn't terribly fair, so you may need to just work on you a bit this summer, too. 


RockChar
by on May. 30, 2016 at 9:26 PM
I'm having the same issue. I bought a croquet set and a bocce ball set to play in our front yard. She also has a big wheels car that she drives around outside. But it's difficult to get her excited about anything that isn't electronics :(
peanutsmommy1
by Ruby Member on May. 30, 2016 at 9:29 PM
Ultimately you are the adult and set the rules, if you don't want him on the electronics so much, take them away
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on May. 30, 2016 at 9:30 PM
I saw that list on FB and made my own!

Quoting Anonymous 3: I saw a really awesome check list of things for kids to do before they get on an electronic such as read for 30 minutes, do 3 chores, help a family member, play outside for 30 minutes, do something artistic. It might help.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on May. 30, 2016 at 9:31 PM
Go out. My kids were getting bored today so we went to the community pool. On Saturday we went to 6 Flags. I keep my kids busy during the summer.
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