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I hate my life

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 27 Replies

I hate my life. I have a lot of health issues (mental and physical). I'm pathetic. I hate myself. No one cares until something dramatic happens. I'm told to stay strong, keeep fighting...but they don't understand, I've already lost. I don't know what I want in life. I don't know what I want right now. All I know is that I'm hurting so much inside that it's eating me alive and one day soon there won't be any of me left. My life is like screaming as loud as you can. No one cares, no one notices. It is like I am dying inside and slowly it is seeping to the outside. I am alone and lonely no matter how many people are around me. No one can help and it hurts to smile. I hold back tears. I can't cry, but I need to. There is nothing between me and death except my own decision to hang on. I'm tired of crying. I'm tired of yelling. I'm tired of being sad. I'm tired of pretending. I'm tired of being alone. I'm tired of being angry. I'm tired of being crazy. I'm tired of being stuck. I'm tired of needing help. I'm just TIRED. 

Posted by Anonymous on Jun. 11, 2016 at 5:37 PM
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Replies (1-10):
constantg
by Platinum Member on Jun. 11, 2016 at 5:39 PM
3 moms liked this

Happiness is a choice. Wallowing in it is a choice. You need to make the choice to be your own positive force. Go to therapy, get medication, do shit for yourself. Wake up every morning and make the choice to be optimistic. 

You are in control of your own life. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jun. 11, 2016 at 5:41 PM

I go to therapy. I take medication. I do what I can for myself. Nothing works. Nothing helps. I'm battling my own demons and losing. 

Quoting constantg:

Happiness is a choice. Wallowing in it is a choice. You need to make the choice to be your own positive force. Go to therapy, get medication, do shit for yourself. Wake up every morning and make the choice to be optimistic. 

You are in control of your own life. 


Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jun. 11, 2016 at 5:41 PM
1 mom liked this
Maybe the reason you think nobody cares is that you are just wearing them out with all your negativity and they can't take it.
heldcaptiveby2
by Ruby Member on Jun. 11, 2016 at 5:42 PM
This!

Quoting constantg:

Happiness is a choice. Wallowing in it is a choice. You need to make the choice to be your own positive force. Go to therapy, get medication, do shit for yourself. Wake up every morning and make the choice to be optimistic. 

You are in control of your own life. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jun. 11, 2016 at 5:43 PM

But I try not to be negative around people. I keep it to myself mostly. 

Quoting Anonymous 2: Maybe the reason you think nobody cares is that you are just wearing them out with all your negativity and they can't take it.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jun. 11, 2016 at 5:43 PM

What medical issues are you facing? Are they terminal?

Who is that you want to care? Why do you think they don't care?

Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Jun. 11, 2016 at 5:44 PM
I too agree with this.
I was just like you, I could have written every word. Someone gave me this advice. I wanted to throw them out the window for not understanding my struggles. Its not that easy I thought. But it was the truth. And that us what saved me. Waking up everyday and doing something to make life better, saved me.

Quoting constantg:

Happiness is a choice. Wallowing in it is a choice. You need to make the choice to be your own positive force. Go to therapy, get medication, do shit for yourself. Wake up every morning and make the choice to be optimistic. 

You are in control of your own life. 

KickingWing
by on Jun. 11, 2016 at 5:45 PM
Ive felt like this a lot when i was younger. At the time, everything was horrible and i felt hopeless.

Now that i am older, it got better. It will get better for you too. I am a stranger to you but i care. If you need someone to talk to, message me.
constantg
by Platinum Member on Jun. 11, 2016 at 5:47 PM

Exactly. I was there too, and it's so easy to make excuses. Glad you got yourself better, mama <3

Quoting Anonymous 4: I too agree with this. I was just like you, I could have written every word. Someone gave me this advice. I wanted to throw them out the window for not understanding my struggles. Its not that easy I thought. But it was the truth. And that us what saved me. Waking up everyday and doing something to make life better, saved me.
Quoting constantg:

Happiness is a choice. Wallowing in it is a choice. You need to make the choice to be your own positive force. Go to therapy, get medication, do shit for yourself. Wake up every morning and make the choice to be optimistic. 

You are in control of your own life. 


Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Jun. 11, 2016 at 5:47 PM
My heart hurts for you, but at the same time my only parent and only sibling are both battling terminal cancer, and they have chosen to try and live life to its fullest. They gave my brother a 3 yr prognosis and he's been with us 5 years, still works everyday, and despite the chemo every 2 weeks, maintains a relatively normal life. My mom is only alive bc of frequent blood transfusions and her will to survive this. I don't know what your medical condition is, but I encourage you to talk to your doctor about antidepressants.
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