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Adult children and vacations

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 22 Replies
What's your opinion on how much involvement they should have on vacation? Do you pay for the expensive things, tickets, lodging, etc. and they pay for their food and activities or the other way around (or neither)?

Do you take in to account things they would like to do or do you choose the designation without their input? Do you sign them up for any fun activities or leave that up to them?

Posted by Anonymous on Aug. 4, 2016 at 1:12 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Aug. 4, 2016 at 2:51 PM
Bump
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Aug. 4, 2016 at 2:55 PM
We have a beach house. Have had it since the kids were little. That's where we go on vacation. DH buys food for the house. At least one night I take everyone out to eat. If they want to eat out more that's on them to pay for. They pay gas and tolls to get there and back. They pay for activities they chose to do.
dandynorm
by Gold Member on Aug. 4, 2016 at 2:55 PM
I pay my daughter's way and give her cash. But that's also in exchange for helping out with her little brothers and babysitting one night so my husband and I can go out.
We do take her input on activities, but also she's free to go do her own thing often as well.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Aug. 4, 2016 at 2:55 PM
Recently I took my 21 and 18 year old daughters with me on vacation. I paid for everything except for what I didn't want to. I paid for all of the necessities and some of the souvenirs. They did all of the activities with us at no cost to them. They're in college working minimum wage jobs, they couldn't afford lodging and food and everything.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Aug. 4, 2016 at 2:56 PM
We go on vacation with my mil and bil yearly. We split the cost between the 4 adults for gas and hotel. Extras like activities or food are an individual cost.
alexmom529
by Platinum Member on Aug. 4, 2016 at 2:56 PM

I think if it is a mutually agreed upon vacation, everyone pays their own way- unless grandma (example) wants to pay it all. If it is something you invite others too, then you pay as you are doing the inviting.

Now as for activities- everyone should get a say. And at least one activity should be done from everyones wish list

Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Aug. 4, 2016 at 2:57 PM

Depends on the family. When my mom takes me on vacation with her she pays for everything no matter how much money I bring. She won't let me spend it. She doesn't sign me/us up with any activities without asking first we decide together.  I'm answering this way because I don't have adult children. But I am an adult child whose mom takes her on vacation.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 6 on Aug. 4, 2016 at 2:58 PM

I do not have adult children, but when we do....we will ask them to go and we will be responsible for paying for the hotel room and some meals.  Since they are adults and hopefully working, then they can go off by themselves and buy their own things.    I dont' think I would sign them up for activities unless I talked to them about it first.

krazymom2boyz
by Platinum Member on Aug. 4, 2016 at 2:59 PM
We go on family vacations at least once a year with my parents, sister's and their families, and us. We all usually pay or own way but everyone will chip in if something unexpected happens and someone needs help. 2 years ago we rented a cabin in at the lake near Branson. My baby sister's husband lost his job and they weren't going to be able to do much so we all helped out. All destinations are agreed upon by all the adults.
Not_A_Native
by Emerald Member on Aug. 4, 2016 at 3:00 PM

I have 4 adult children.

If we plan on taking them (or want to), we tell them they are welcome.  If they decide to come, we pay for lodging, airfare, some meals.  We quit paying for incidentals awhile back.

We can afford it, so we do it.  Money isn't the issue.

Sometimes (many times) we go places and do NOT invite them.  Not everything is a family vacation.

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