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How can I be a better SM now?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 10 Replies
DH and I married 7 years ago. We dated for a year first.

When we met he had a 4 and 6 year old. Things with the kids and I were great until the drama with BM started.

The kids had just really started school and BM suddenly didn't want them. DH wasn't Mr. Custody either.

I disengaged from the drama. I was kind to the kids but I put some rules in place that protected me and my kids from gve bullshit.

If SK were at our house then DH had to be home as well.

DH had to handle all gbd discipline.

DH had to handle bm, school events, and all medical.

I just bought food, cooked, and planned birthdays.

The kids and I get along great but I wonder if there a way to be better now that the drama is less.
Posted by Anonymous on Aug. 6, 2016 at 11:15 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Aug. 6, 2016 at 11:23 AM
Bump
SAHMJC
by Emerald Member on Aug. 6, 2016 at 11:26 AM
I think you're doing just fine.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Aug. 6, 2016 at 11:26 AM
If its not broken, don't fix it.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Aug. 6, 2016 at 11:31 AM
DH always resented that I wasn't a second mom to his kids.

Quoting SAHMJC: I think you're doing just fine.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Aug. 6, 2016 at 11:31 AM

There's no such thing as a good SM in this group.

Ted1242
by I'm listening. on Aug. 6, 2016 at 11:34 AM
I think you're doing great. If you have a good relationship with the children, that's what matters.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Aug. 6, 2016 at 11:34 AM

If you want to be more of a mom to them then do it. As long as you aren't stepping on toes its cool. I grew up with a step parent and I love him dearly. I am his daughter and I can go to him just as I would my dad. 

paintmehappy
by Bronze Member on Aug. 6, 2016 at 11:36 AM
Im in the same boat but now it's court ordered Dh has custody and BM hardly sees them.
nononenever
by Silver Member on Aug. 6, 2016 at 11:36 AM
Sounds like you're doing fine. You're being kind and you get along well. They have parents that can deal with the parent stuff. And they have you as a supportive and caring adult. Sounds like they're pretty lucky.
SAHMJC
by Emerald Member on Aug. 6, 2016 at 12:39 PM
It sounds like he just wants you to do everything for him. Those kids have two parents

Quoting Anonymous 1: DH always resented that I wasn't a second mom to his kids.

Quoting SAHMJC: I think you're doing just fine.
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