Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Having an affair....

Posted by Anonymous
  • 41 Replies
So last saturday i went out with my first puppy love. Peter... I guess you can call it. After 13 years we have always talked and texted and just tried to keep on being friends. We met in 7th grade and at 13 yrs old we "fell in love" ( though i have always felt like i was always in love with him)

He now is a successful man with his own landscaping business and i am an HR generalist. We have both grown to be successful. The only issue is that. At the age of 17 i got pregnant. My mother kicked me out and i lived with they guy that got me pregnant, Mark. I am realizing that i was never in love with him. But i grew to love him. We have been together 6 years but they have always been rocky. He has made me question his loyalty 3 times. Once with 2 of his ex's and once with my sister. I have always been loyal until this passed saturday.

On tuesday i was posting snap chats of me blasting music. I wrote "i need a drink tonight" to which he responded. "Yea i need a drink too." I played along with it and said " we should get drinks this weekend. He agreed. When thursday came by he snapped chatted "are we still on" thats when i thought about it... How can i go when i am in a relationship. We have not seen eachother in 5 years. And i really wanted to see him. My heart started racing... I said yes. He asked if i was given permission. Meaning if i told my boyfriend (of 6 years and 2 kids) i said i dnt need permission. I am just gonna say i went out with my friends.

Saturday night came and i met him at his house. We were just talking for about 2 hours catching up and talking about how everything has been going these past years. Then he said we should go out get drinks. Bar or club. I said club. I do not go out much but when i do i perfer to dance than drink. We only had 4 drinks and danced the night away. While we were dancing and having fun a slow bachata song came out and we danced closer. And then it became ahug and then it became a kiss...

My heart raced and fluttered and i couldnt contain myself. I kissed him back. With so much passion. And he did as well. He held me. He hugged me. He caressed me. I felt happy. I felt whole.

After the kissed we danced till 12am then decided to leave. He us drove back to his place where i left my car. We have been out since 9pm till 1am. When we got to his house i asked to use the bathroom. Since i was drinking and i havent used the bathroom in a while i really had to go. After i went i started heading out. But he stopped me. Then he lead me to his room. He gave me a kiss on the forhead and turned off the lights.

And we made love.

Not sex, love. The way he held me. The way he kissed me. I have never felt so much passion. So many emotions. So in love, and loved i felt.

Afterwards we just layed there. Cudfled by eachother.

It was 2:30 am when i realized i had to leave. He didnt want me too. He kept pulling me in. It took so much out of me not to leave. But i have two kids, and i must. He kissed me goodbye. And i left. In tears, so in love, so hurt, wishing i could stay.

Before i left i told him i loved him. And i wished he still felt the same way i feel about him he said "i do too, but what difference does it make now?"

Now that we havebeen seeing each other this past week i want to end my 6year relationship. I do not know how but i do. Peter still has the same feelings i have towards him. And i want to make it work with him. I just do not know how to end things with Mark.

What are your opinions? I will answer any questions as well. Please help.
Posted by Anonymous on Aug. 18, 2016 at 11:38 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Aug. 18, 2016 at 11:49 PM
Any help is greatly appreciated. As dumb as that maybe. I just needed to get this of my chest as well
by Sapphire Member on Aug. 18, 2016 at 11:49 PM
9 moms liked this

Say "Hey Mark!  I'm tired of fucking you, I prefer making love with Peter.  There's juice in the fridge, byeeeeeeee!"

by Anonymous 2 on Aug. 18, 2016 at 11:53 PM
End your the relationship. If you're unhappy, leave. Don't cheat.
by Navy Mom on Aug. 18, 2016 at 11:54 PM
2 moms liked this

I don't know.  As someone who's been cheated upon, i can tell you that I would not only A., not get into a relationship with someone without first ending my current one, and B., wouldn't have any respect for someone who wanted to cheat on their partner with me.  Jumping from one man to the other without any thought of consequences for you or your kids is just not good.

by Anonymous 3 on Aug. 18, 2016 at 11:56 PM
I feel like I read this in a novel but.....

I'm in the same boat except I'm married and want to be with the "one that got away" but my life is good except for the sex with dh. My ex always had a way of making love that I can still feel it when were around one another. I've not acted on it but I'm so tempted, especially when I'm home alone and he gets here a little early to get our daughter. Ugh

But just tell you bf that it's over and go to court for visitation, custody, and child support
by Silver Member on Aug. 18, 2016 at 11:57 PM

Quoting corticosteroid:

Say "Hey Mark!  I'm tired of fucking you, I prefer making love with Peter.  There's juice in the fridge, byeeeeeeee!"

by Anonymous 4 on Aug. 19, 2016 at 12:00 AM
So, let's say you end it with your sig other. What is your plan? Where will you live with your two children? Are you going to jump from Mark's bed to Peter's ? Where will your children be in all of this? One minute their living with daddy, the next minute a new one. I think you should leave him. But I hope your able to get your own place and give your kids time to adjust. Nobody should be in an unhappy situation but you don't seem to be thinking of your kids.
by Anonymous 5 on Aug. 19, 2016 at 12:03 AM
Why does everyone over sharing about their affairs try to write it like it's some trash novel?

It just screams troll.
by Silver Member on Aug. 19, 2016 at 12:04 AM
1 mom liked this
If you are an HR assistant you have had much experience with communicating difficult conversations. Approach it the same as you would an employee conversation that is not going to end well. Determine what you are willing to share (whether you tell him you cheated or you lie about it). Anticipate the reaction. Include positives. Deliver the message clearly and with as much care as you can. You don't need advice.
by Anonymous 6 on Aug. 19, 2016 at 12:06 AM
1 mom liked this
80/20. It is assumed that in any relationship you'll only get 80% of what you want/need.

There is always something/someone who looks better than what you already have. It's not until it's too late you realize you've settled for 20% of a relationship when you had 80%.

So, you're gonna leave the 80% that you have with Mark for the 20% Peter is giving you. Smart!

Because, in reality, it's not all its cracked up to he willing to take on your kids? That's just one question, you come up with the rest.
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)