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Home childcare providers, advice needed

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 7 Replies
I have extensive experience working with children but I have encountered a situation I have never had to deal with. I know children will go through stages where they may hit their friends. I am keeping a 13 month old little boy. He will kick, hit, push, and hit the other child with toys. I have removed him from each situation and even monitoring him as much as I am able. I have given him separate playing areas from the other children to minimize the encounters. I have set up a time out spot as well. He pushed another baby today and she fell and hit her face, she has a bruise now. He actually is leaving marks. He will even hit at me when I am correcting him. Any advice for those that have dealt with this before? I am not overloaded with children as I only keep 3, I am actually wondering what else I can do to correct this situation
Posted by Anonymous on Sep. 7, 2016 at 10:56 AM
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Sep. 7, 2016 at 11:59 AM
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The child needs a way to express himself and is possibly frustrated by not being able to express and articulate himself. Or is living with abuse?
Can you sit with the children and play, so that they get a good amount of attention and direction as well as they can see how to interact appropriately?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Sep. 7, 2016 at 12:24 PM
Yes, I do sit with them and play, read, and sing. I agree he is trying to express himself, he does have a 10 year old brother, perhaps he is repeating how brother may be treating him. Maybe time to sit down with the parents and get some insight, thank you for your advice
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Sep. 7, 2016 at 12:28 PM
1 mom liked this
Not a child care provider but a mom of 6.
At that age I get down on the floor at their level. Hold their hands in mine and say no hitting, be nice. (Exchange hitting for pushing, biting, whatever).
Then take their hand and have them lightly rub your forearm while saying be nice, be gentle. Then rub their arm while saying be nice l, be gentle.
Then distract them with a toy in a different area.
skipp2
by Silver Member on Sep. 7, 2016 at 12:41 PM
1 mom liked this

13 months is still pretty young. Is he attempting to verbalize yet? Walking? Or working on gross and fine motor skills?

I had a little one in my care who sounded exactly as you're describing your guy. Every morning rather than free play I would practice walking with him then sit him in his highchair at the table with simple tasks. Having him grasp a block and put it in a container, dump the container, simple stacking toys etc. 

I find that kids that age need instant reaction, a shove or a smack cause a reaction and if they don't know what else they can do with their body, they will continue to shove and smack.

I also showed him how to wave his hands, his arms, stomp his foot against the floor, clap, bang the table, roll around, blow bubbles, etc. Once he figured out that he could do other things with his body and get a reaction, he just stopped hitting and pushing.

Oh, and every single thing he threw I took. I'd say no and gone and that would be the end of it. I still have a bin of his various 'weapons' in my basement somewhere : )

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Sep. 7, 2016 at 2:37 PM
Funny you mentioned that, my sister said she had to take my nephews hand and show him gentle, great idea

Quoting Anonymous 3: Not a child care provider but a mom of 6.
At that age I get down on the floor at their level. Hold their hands in mine and say no hitting, be nice. (Exchange hitting for pushing, biting, whatever).
Then take their hand and have them lightly rub your forearm while saying be nice, be gentle. Then rub their arm while saying be nice l, be gentle.
Then distract them with a toy in a different area.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Sep. 7, 2016 at 2:39 PM
He is pretty verbal for his age. He sings songs and repeats a lot. He will hit and then say no. You have given some great insight, I need to rethink my approach with him. I can tell he is very intelligent

Quoting skipp2:

13 months is still pretty young. Is he attempting to verbalize yet? Walking? Or working on gross and fine motor skills?

I had a little one in my care who sounded exactly as you're describing your guy. Every morning rather than free play I would practice walking with him then sit him in his highchair at the table with simple tasks. Having him grasp a block and put it in a container, dump the container, simple stacking toys etc. 

I find that kids that age need instant reaction, a shove or a smack cause a reaction and if they don't know what else they can do with their body, they will continue to shove and smack.

I also showed him how to wave his hands, his arms, stomp his foot against the floor, clap, bang the table, roll around, blow bubbles, etc. Once he figured out that he could do other things with his body and get a reaction, he just stopped hitting and pushing.

Oh, and every single thing he threw I took. I'd say no and gone and that would be the end of it. I still have a bin of his various 'weapons' in my basement somewhere : )

othermom
by Ruby Member on Sep. 7, 2016 at 4:40 PM

Talk with his parents about it. Does he talk at all? Maybe try teaching him sign language so he can communicate more. Keep a play pen where you can put him some where safe if he starts to hit, redirect him if he starts to act up.

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