Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

They forgot my son!

Posted by on Nov. 28, 2016 at 8:30 AM
  • 25 Replies
This happened a few weeks ago but I was wondering if I could get your input.

A few weeks ago I was picking my kids up at elementary school. When my son, who is 4 (he's in the schools VEPK program), got in the car he said, "mommy, I have to tell you something important". He proceeded to tell me that earlier that day he was forgotten in the classroom. He detailed everything he could. He saw the class was gone (he was apparently going potty) and started crying. Then he decided he should just walk home so he left the classroom (VEPK classrooms are mobile units). He found that the gate was locked (thank God!) so he tried to go back in the classroom. He then found that the classroom door had locked behind him. He was essentially trapped on the ramp that goes from the classroom to the gate. He said he started crying again then after a "long time" someone came to get him. That's his story.

So, upon him telling me all of this I hit a u-turn and went back to the school. I knew that his regular teacher was out but I obviously wanted answers.

Long story short, it turned out that the classroom only had 2 aides that day. The first aide that we spoke to (Principal, Vice Principal, my son, and myself) claimed my son was attention seeking and made it all up. Not one of us believed her because, as the principal stated, his story was too detailed to have been made up. The second aide, who is the actual classroom aide, had already left so the vp called her on speaker. The second aide confirmed my son was left behind but only for about 90 seconds. I didn't quite believe the 90 second part because everything he described he did would have taken longer than that, but I appreciated her honesty otherwise.

The principal told me that he'd be taking administrative action against the second aide, the one who works in the classroom full time. He was talking about unpaid suspension. However, I made a plea on her behalf. I told him that she was likely overwhelmed because there was no teacher in the classroom and that is not her fault. I also pointed out that she is generally very good with the children and, unless this happens frequently, she deserves another chance. I also pointed out that she was honest and accepted responsibility for what happened instead of lying. Perhaps she should be written up because you should ALWAYS do a head count when leaving the classroom, but I felt like suspension was too much.

She did wind up getting written up, but not suspended.

Now the problem:

I just found out that the other aide had no consequences at all. This bothers me. They wanted to suspend the overwhelmed aide who was honest about her mistake but nothing happened to the one who lied (the aide who told the truth stated that she told the other aide that my son wasn't there and she had to go look for him).

To add insult to injury, the aide who lied was nominated as staff member of the year. Now, I would never try to take that away from her, even though this is the second incident involving that aide (first with my daughter, then my son) but I feel a bit peeved that there was never so much as a write up for the aide who lied.

A part of me wants to go to the school and discuss it. I mean, it's only fair that both aides receive a consequence for what happened, BUT it has been a few weeks so maybe I should just let it go. Idk...it's bothering me so I thought I would get your opinions on it.

Should I talk to the school or just let it go?
by on Nov. 28, 2016 at 8:30 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
corticosteroid
by Sapphire Member on Nov. 28, 2016 at 8:35 AM

You should have let it go a looooooooooong time ago.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Nov. 28, 2016 at 8:44 AM
1 mom liked this
Easy to say when it's not your kid.

Quoting corticosteroid:

You should have let it go a looooooooooong time ago.

mom2many747
by Momma Duck on Nov. 28, 2016 at 8:45 AM
How could I have let it go a long time ago when I just found out this morning that the aide who lied didn't receive consequences?

I let the incident itself go but the new information bothered me. It's not the first time she's been caught in a lie.


Quoting corticosteroid:

You should have let it go a looooooooooong time ago.

corticosteroid
by Sapphire Member on Nov. 28, 2016 at 8:46 AM

You could have let it go when it happened.  

Quoting mom2many747: How could I have let it go a long time ago when I just found out this morning that the aide who lied didn't receive consequences? I let the incident itself go but the new information bothered me. It's not the first time she's been caught in a lie.
Quoting corticosteroid:

You should have let it go a looooooooooong time ago.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Nov. 28, 2016 at 8:52 AM
1 mom liked this
That would make me very angry. I don't think there's anything you can do at this point, though. Why was there no teacher?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Nov. 28, 2016 at 8:52 AM

Do you want the other aide fired?

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Nov. 28, 2016 at 8:56 AM
2 moms liked this
Do you not have children or are you just completely unfeeling?
How exactly do you let something like that go? That's her child. These people are trusted with our kids and yes mistakes happen, I think she's accepted that, but then to lie about it and it's not the first time. That's a pattern and most likely something really terrible will happen as a result if this aide is not ever reprimanded.

Why do you dismiss so easily?

Quoting corticosteroid:

You could have let it go when it happened.  

Quoting mom2many747: How could I have let it go a long time ago when I just found out this morning that the aide who lied didn't receive consequences?



I let the incident itself go but the new information bothered me. It's not the first time she's been caught in a lie.




Quoting corticosteroid:

You should have let it go a looooooooooong time ago.

mom2many747
by Momma Duck on Nov. 28, 2016 at 8:56 AM
You usually read much better than this...

I let the actual incident go.

What I haven't let go is the information I found out 30 minutes ago.

Do you not feel it's fair to give both aides involved the same consequence? Should it be OK for you to lie about an incident involving a 4 year olds safety and receive no consequences for it? If you believe this is the case then I question your ethics.

The post merely outlines the incident itself to give back story. My question is not based on the incident, but rather on NEW information.


Quoting corticosteroid:

You could have let it go when it happened.  

Quoting mom2many747: How could I have let it go a long time ago when I just found out this morning that the aide who lied didn't receive consequences?

I let the incident itself go but the new information bothered me. It's not the first time she's been caught in a lie.


Quoting corticosteroid:

You should have let it go a looooooooooong time ago.

corticosteroid
by Sapphire Member on Nov. 28, 2016 at 8:57 AM

No, you didn't let it go, you went back to the school to complain when it happened, which is the opposite of letting it go.  This was a mistake, it's not that big a deal.

Quoting mom2many747: You usually read much better than this... I let the actual incident go. What I haven't let go is the information I found out 30 minutes ago. Do you not feel it's fair to give both aides involved the same consequence? Should it be OK for you to lie about an incident involving a 4 year olds safety and receive no consequences for it? If you believe this is the case then I question your ethics. The post merely outlines the incident itself to give back story. My question is not based on the incident, but rather on NEW information.
Quoting corticosteroid:

You could have let it go when it happened.  

Quoting mom2many747: How could I have let it go a long time ago when I just found out this morning that the aide who lied didn't receive consequences? I let the incident itself go but the new information bothered me. It's not the first time she's been caught in a lie.
Quoting corticosteroid:

You should have let it go a looooooooooong time ago.


peanutsmommy1
by Ruby Member on Nov. 28, 2016 at 8:58 AM
Unfortunately you don't get to decide what punishment the school gives out
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)