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Not sure what to do. ***UPDATE***

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 14 Replies
My Aunt called the other night concerned for our safety. I will see a lawyer soon and see what needs to be done.

A mutual friend of my sister and I contacted me yesterday morning as well concerned. She told me my sister had posted a video of herself crying and wailing about all of us being so mean to her. It was a 15 minute bash fest of me, my parents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and other friends who she feels have wronged her. Since my daughter has her on her social media, she found her video and we watched it. She was hysterical and threatening us all with how God would take care of us when we met with him face to face. She went on and on about how she was blameless. But, at other times in the video, she owned up to her faults but made excuses for her mean, nasty, violent behavior.

It is obvious she is not right. It is also obvious she is dangerous. I am not sure a RO would stop her or make her go into a rage and come after us.


********************************************************

My elderly parents and 19 year old niece came to our house for Thanksgiving. My 50 year old sister who lives with them, did not.

She has moved back in with them. She has a history of drugs, alcohol, and was arrested 3 years ago for trying to kill our mother. My parents had an RO set up that would have expired last year and renewed but my dad felt sorry for her and found her an apartment and she got a part time job. Things seemed better then she met a nice guy, quit her job, gave up her apartment, and moved in with him. Then they moved 4 hours away due to his job and got engaged but things between them got worse. We know she threatened his mother as his mother had an RO issued against her. Soon, her fiancé also issued an RO against her and begged my Dad to come get her. She was staying in a run down motel with barely no money left and no food. Dad could not go get her but her best friend did and brought her back to my parent's home. She promised she would look for work and be out in six weeks. This was last Winter!

Since then, things have gone from bad to worse. She now is a legal tenant and my parents claim they cannot legally evict her according to their local tenant laws. She is verbally and emotionally abusive. Threatens them for money, takes their food, and also controls how and what they eat. My mother and niece want her out for good but Dad refuses and we ended up having a terrible argument over this. My niece is a Freshman at a college several hours away and her own mother had threatened her declaring that she can come up there anytime she wants. She has hacked my Dad and my niece's social media accounts and threatened me on occasion. Our mutual friends saw a social media conversation between my sister and one of her friends about me, calling me vile names and even going so far as to go to my employer and hatch up a scheme to get me fired. I already told my employer about her. My dh did the same with his employer. No worries there.

My aunt called last night and is truly worried about us all, especially Mom who has Cancer. My parents are rail thin and it is obvious they are sick from the cruel treatment.

I have been thinking of going to a friend in town who is a lawyer and get advise. We tried to report this all to Elder Abuse before but to no avail did it do any good.

I need to know if any of you ladies were in a similar position and what was done about it. My mom and need would get another RO against her but Dad won't consider it. I question his mental health as he and my sister have such a codependent relationship as it is. He left extremely angry at me.

What should I do?
Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 28, 2016 at 12:00 PM
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Replies (1-10):
STVUstudent
by Ruby Member on Nov. 28, 2016 at 12:03 PM

if he is not willing to do anything there may not be much you can do...

mojogirl
by Ouiser Boudreaux on Nov. 28, 2016 at 12:07 PM

where do they live where you can't evict someone?

do you live in a one-person consent state of tape recording? if so, buy them a tape recorder and have them record her abuse. hand it over to the police.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Nov. 28, 2016 at 12:09 PM
That's what I figured. Mom has threatened to leave him but does not drive and would need someone to take her for her Chemo appointments.

If he did go first, then I could do something. My sister has threatened to take their house which is not paid off. No Will or anything of real expense but just the thought of her threatening me over everything is enough to make me wonder what to do.

Quoting STVUstudent:

if he is not willing to do anything there may not be much you can do...

MrsBieg
by Platinum Member on Nov. 28, 2016 at 12:10 PM
I would run her over with my car, but that's me. Your mother need ds to visit with a lawyer. And actually, your niece probably has access to various avenues of advice and assistance through her college.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Nov. 28, 2016 at 12:12 PM
That is an idea. My dh doesn't think she cannot be evicted. My niece is telling them to throw her things out and change the locks.

That I believe would make her go into another narcissistic rage and try to hurt them again.

Quoting mojogirl:

where do they live where you can't evict someone?

do you live in a one-person consent state of tape recording? if so, buy them a tape recorder and have them record her abuse. hand it over to the police.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Nov. 28, 2016 at 12:21 PM
We think as she is verbally and physically narcissistic, she is going to get into a fight with someone who will take care of her.

Quoting MrsBieg: I would run her over with my car, but that's me. Your mother need ds to visit with a lawyer. And actually, your niece probably has access to various avenues of advice and assistance through her college.

PinkButterfly66
by Sapphire Member on Nov. 28, 2016 at 12:29 PM

Call social services and report your sister for elder abuse.  They should be able to help get her out of there.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Nov. 28, 2016 at 12:37 PM
We tried that once before. They were of no help.

Quoting PinkButterfly66:

Call social services and report your sister for elder abuse.  They should be able to help get her out of there.

ToadMum
by Silver Member on Nov. 28, 2016 at 12:46 PM
Call the police and tell them you are concerned for your parents wellbeing and suspect elder abuse, forgo social services for the time being.

The police will do a wellness check, talk to friends and family and hopefully gather evidence to take her into custody.
STVUstudent
by Ruby Member on Nov. 28, 2016 at 1:15 PM

If your father will not do anything, SHE needs to go immediately (perhaps you could take her?) and see a lawyer.  If there is no will there will be one huge soup sandwich... so if nothing else, SHE needs one.

Quoting Anonymous 1: That's what I figured. Mom has threatened to leave him but does not drive and would need someone to take her for her Chemo appointments. If he did go first, then I could do something. My sister has threatened to take their house which is not paid off. No Will or anything of real expense but just the thought of her threatening me over everything is enough to make me wonder what to do.
Quoting STVUstudent:

if he is not willing to do anything there may not be much you can do...


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