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I hate my F'ing future MIL

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 96 Replies

My fiance's mother feels the need to be involved in all the decisions of our baby. Now supposedly she cried to my fiancé saying that I'm excluding her from things and that she feels like she won't be a part of the baby's life are you freaking kidding me? I am trying to be the most patient person ever with her but I am really starting to get pissed off. This lady thinks my child is a doll to be letting her borrow him! We're also moving to a new place around February and that was just the cherry topper now I am officially keeping her away from Bradley. I sat here and told him I don't have to satisfy anyone I make the decisions for my child I don't need the approval. Am I being crazy, or wrong in any way? Opinions are welcomed.

Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 11, 2017 at 12:41 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jan. 11, 2017 at 12:43 PM
2 moms liked this

I would nip it in the bud now even if things have to get a little ugly. Otherwise you're going to have to deal with her bs FOREVER. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jan. 11, 2017 at 12:43 PM
10 moms liked this
Well since you gave vague details I really can't tell who is the overbearing dipshit, you or her.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Jan. 11, 2017 at 12:44 PM
2 moms liked this
You're not wrong. She has to learn that being a loving grandparent doesn't mean being a third parent. Don't back down.
quinnsmom715
by Ruby Member on Jan. 11, 2017 at 12:45 PM
7 moms liked this

im waiting for the 'but its faammilyyyy' responses..

Supercooper07
by Gold Member on Jan. 11, 2017 at 12:48 PM
Tell her to stop taking everything so personally and that you're just doing what you and your DF think are best for your family. Better yet, have him tell her.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Jan. 11, 2017 at 12:48 PM
1 mom liked this
Well, it is not just your child, it is your finances, too. So, you should both be making decisions.
MonarchMom22
by Bronze Member on Jan. 11, 2017 at 12:48 PM
3 moms liked this

I'm glad you are going to be moving - that is a perfect time to set up new routines and arrangements.  Keep in mind, she will be in your life a long, long time - and one day you may feel differently or need her help.  That said, there is no reason she should use tears to get her way or complain about your decisions.

I would keep it friendly but with some distant.  If she gives you advice just say something like "how interesting, is that what you did when you had babies?" Let her be heard but do not engage in debate or argrument. Either of those puts her is a postion of having some right to weigh in on decisions.  Just let her have her say and frame it as her own story - not part of your choices.

If you can learn to do this with her and be more detached without getting wrapped up in drama, it will serve you well in many other situations. It is good life skill to handle conflict without taking it personal.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 6 on Jan. 11, 2017 at 12:49 PM
3 moms liked this
You sound unhinged actually. I also can't stand little girls who get knocked up before marriage. Is your mom also going to be distanced like your possible future mil? It is also so trashy to diss the mother of your bf.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 7 on Jan. 11, 2017 at 12:50 PM

good luck, its downhill from here lol! honestly depends on your husband how he is with her and how he sticks up for you. my DH was whatever mommy wanted if i had a concern or upset about something he would make it worse and have me in tears. it was really horrible. but hes just not a nice person. dont deal with her direct let your spouse deal with her and you address and discuss your concerns with him. ive also learned to not care as much and just let her talk.

i truly dont get mothers of sons, i mean they try to relive their lives through the sons life. my mother in law was the same way, the fights and tears she would cause to get her way for my child. it was sad, now i just dont care and i pay no mind to her or my spouse

mojogirl
by Ouiser Boudreaux on Jan. 11, 2017 at 12:51 PM
3 moms liked this

well you've already gotten yourself into this mess by getting knocked up so enjoy life with your crazy mil.

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