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ETA I don't love my skids like my own.

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
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I love them like they are a part of dh family, kind of like my in laws.
I understand he has a responsibility to them but I do not.
I do my best not to interfere in their relationships.
Their parents have decided to raise them in a way that makes them downright unlikeable at times and that is their right to do as they are theirs.
I'll make them a meal or do a load of laundry but I'm not spending extra time alone with them. I'm not babysitting.

Eta
They also don't love me like their mom and that's OK. They like the fact that I respect their family and don't intrude. They didn't ask to Marry me their dad did.

I also don't love my in laws like my parents.

None of this means I am evil to them or treat them bad, in fact I'm conscious to treat them extra kindly. I just don't love them like I love mine.
Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 13, 2017 at 8:57 AM
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Replies (1-10):
GLO682
by Gold Member on Jan. 13, 2017 at 8:59 AM
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I don't understand why people marry into relationships where there are other kids involved and then resent them.

THey didnt ask to be a part of a broken family, and maybe you showing them love and affection will make them more likeable.

I also understand not being able to make yourself feel something you don't but the fact that you consider time with your step kids babysitting makes you an asshole.

fullxbusymom
by Sapphire Member on Jan. 13, 2017 at 9:01 AM

I agree with this 100%.

Quoting GLO682:

I don't understand why people marry into relationships where there are other kids involved and then resent them.

THey didnt ask to be a part of a broken family, and maybe you showing them love and affection will make them more likeable.

I also understand not being able to make yourself feel something you don't but the fact that you consider time with your step kids babysitting makes you an asshole.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 13, 2017 at 9:03 AM
What else would you call watching a child that isn't yours?

I didn't say I don't show them love I said I don't love them like my own. I'm very kind to them and give them lots of alone time with Dad.
These kids are what I consider poorly behaved so they wouldn't want to be alone with me anyway because my kids have structure and discipline.

Quoting GLO682:

I don't understand why people marry into relationships where there are other kids involved and then resent them.

THey didnt ask to be a part of a broken family, and maybe you showing them love and affection will make them more likeable.

I also understand not being able to make yourself feel something you don't but the fact that you consider time with your step kids babysitting makes you an asshole.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jan. 13, 2017 at 9:05 AM
1 mom liked this

I think a lot of step parents feel this way. Don't be surprised if your husband feels the same way about your kids too.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jan. 13, 2017 at 9:05 AM
What's the age difference between your kids and step kids?
GLO682
by Gold Member on Jan. 13, 2017 at 9:05 AM
1 mom liked this

 I would call it a family.

I am assuming if they are your step kids, you are married.

So that whole Your kids, my kids mindset should never be an issue.




Quoting Anonymous 1: What else would you call watching a child that isn't yours? I didn't say I don't show them love I said I don't love them like my own. I'm very kind to them and give them lots of alone time with Dad. These kids are what I consider poorly behaved so they wouldn't want to be alone with me anyway because my kids have structure and discipline.
Quoting GLO682:

I don't understand why people marry into relationships where there are other kids involved and then resent them.

THey didnt ask to be a part of a broken family, and maybe you showing them love and affection will make them more likeable.

I also understand not being able to make yourself feel something you don't but the fact that you consider time with your step kids babysitting makes you an asshole.


PrettyWings29
by Caribbean Queen on Jan. 13, 2017 at 9:06 AM

That seems normal. They're not your children. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Jan. 13, 2017 at 9:06 AM
Quoting Anonymous 1: What else would you call watching a child that isn't yours?

I didn't say I don't show them love I said I don't love them like my own. I'm very kind to them and give them lots of alone time with Dad.
These kids are what I consider poorly behaved so they wouldn't want to be alone with me anyway because my kids have structure and discipline.

Quoting GLO682:

I don't understand why people marry into relationships where there are other kids involved and then resent them.

THey didnt ask to be a part of a broken family, and maybe you showing them love and affection will make them more likeable.

I also understand not being able to make yourself feel something you don't but the fact that you consider time with your step kids babysitting makes you an asshole.

I agree with you. I also think anyone of these idiots on here that say they love someone else's child like their own are damn liars. Lol!
PrettyWings29
by Caribbean Queen on Jan. 13, 2017 at 9:07 AM

However you should spend time with them and get to know them. It's not "babysitting", it's building a relationship with them. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 13, 2017 at 9:07 AM
Well my kid is my husband's so he better not lol. I do have a niece and nephew i raised and I'm almost certain he does feel that way.

Quoting Anonymous 2:

I think a lot of step parents feel this way. Don't be surprised if your husband feels the same way about your kids too.

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