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Irritated with SO... but part of me feels I shouldn't be

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 11 Replies

So my fiance went to a concert last year at income tax time. I was pregnant at the time so I could not go with him. He told me it would be the only time because his "band" or whatever you want to call them do not come around and play often. Also because he knew when the baby was born that he wouldn't have a lot of time and had to plan things in advance.


Skip forward to today. He just told me that he wanted to set aside money from income tax to go again this year. Without me. Our son was born in June, and we have 2 other children to tend to. He gets to go out to friends or invite friends over quite often while I do not get any 'me' time at all. I guess I wouldn't mind so much if I would be able to get out myself, but I can't. Also, the fact that money is tight right now and we cannot afford that. 


Am I in the wrong for being irritated and not wanting him to go, especially because he didn't talk it over/discuss with me or even mention it until now when he says "I want at least $$$ from income tax for this concert."

Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 13, 2017 at 4:13 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Twinklesthecat
by Gold Member on Jan. 13, 2017 at 4:15 PM
2 moms liked this
So do the same tell him you'll take the same amount out for yourself and have a day to yourself, maybe go to a nice spa or something. Don't be a doormat tell him how you feel
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jan. 13, 2017 at 4:16 PM
He thinks he can do whatever he wants since you're not married.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jan. 13, 2017 at 4:17 PM

I'd be super irritated. That actually wouldn't fly in my house. I'd tell him that's fine as long as you can hold down the fort while I take a weekend trip (or whatever you want to do) with [insert best friend's name here]. I don't play the sitting around at home while other people have fun thing. That's not cool of him or anyone to expect their spouse to just stay home with the kids ALL the time. I'd put my foot down this year or it will never end. You sound a bit too nice. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Jan. 13, 2017 at 4:17 PM
1. You need to tell him how you feel.

2. You both need to get away from the kids. Get a sitter.
Smari
by Bronze Member on Jan. 13, 2017 at 4:17 PM

 

Quoting Twinklesthecat: So do the same tell him you'll take the same amount out for yourself and have a day to yourself, maybe go to a nice spa or something. Don't be a doormat tell him how you feel

 I totally agree. It is 50/50. You should be able to take the same amount and have some me time.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Jan. 13, 2017 at 4:18 PM
Is he demanding this money out of your return? Or letting you know he's keeping it from his?
AmaliaD
by Ruby Member on Jan. 13, 2017 at 4:21 PM
He sounds selfish to me.
KenneMaw
by Ruby Member on Jan. 13, 2017 at 4:21 PM

Well, it is only January, so let him get a 2nd job to pay for this trip.   He wants to go bad enough, he can earn the money.

Also, I think you need to talk to him about you needing a bit of "me" time.   A few days ago, a mother stated how she uses a babysitter 2x per month or somethign like that, for for 4hours, and she does whatever she wants - lunch, sitting in a park reading, taking a long nap, etc....Maybe you need to do the same thing.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 6 on Jan. 13, 2017 at 4:22 PM
So is it his return money or yours?
shell3m
by Shell on Jan. 13, 2017 at 4:24 PM
Hahahahahahaha!!!!
Fuck that!! Nope. He would not be going.
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