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I avoid confrontation or 'telling' on people, but I need help now

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 8 Replies
I signed ds up for the big brother program. He was matched last Jan. The last contact we had with the Big was in October or early November. He was supposed to text about the following weekend but never did and by the time I realized how much time has gone by, it was mid dec, and it felt weird to be like "oh hey, I forgot about you, maybe you forgot about kiddo or perhaps you just aren't interested in being a big brother anymore. Lmk your intentions" or whatever.... so I left it alone.

Except now, the coordinator texted, wanting to speak with ds (which is normal, she calls for him every few months to see how things are going)... and I have no idea what to say.

In the end, I think I'd rather just pull ds out of the program. I signed him up thinking he'd benefit from having a big brother but he's had two (a sister and a brother). The sister quit bc she had a second child, which is understandable but ds got attached and it hurt ds, thinking that everyone leaves him (the same year, his bio dad came into his life then disappeared again, my then bf and i broke up and our pet passed away)... so far, ds hasn't asked too much about this big brother.

I just don't know what to do. I know the right thing would be to tell the coordinator but I'm not sure how to word it and quite honestly, I'm just socially awkward so really thinking about it, I seem to avoid any situation.
Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 13, 2017 at 7:44 PM
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Replies (1-8):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jan. 13, 2017 at 7:46 PM
1 mom liked this
Just be honest to them.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jan. 13, 2017 at 7:49 PM
1 mom liked this

I would tell all of this to the supervisor and tell her that if he is to continue he needs someone that has been with the program for a long time and knows he can commit to a long term relationship with him. If not he is out. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Jan. 13, 2017 at 7:54 PM
Just say I'm glad you called things have gotten a bit busy and we haven't been able to connect with the big brother. He was supposed to get back to us at this date but hadn't and the next thing I know it's January. Time really does fly by. Lol.
redheadtmk
by Ruby Member on Jan. 13, 2017 at 7:55 PM

I would just say that they have not been able to meet up since before the Christmas holidays and you havent heard from him since then. She asked a question, you give an honest answer. You dont need to put any blame on him or take blame yourself. Its a simple question with a simple answer

Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Jan. 13, 2017 at 7:57 PM
I would just tell her how things are going. Just talk to her like your talking to your teacher/friends mom or something.
Dannygirl25
by on Jan. 13, 2017 at 8:05 PM
1 mom liked this
I'd tell them the truth
Anonymous
by Anonymous 6 on Jan. 13, 2017 at 8:26 PM
1 mom liked this
Just tell them that you actually haven't met with the "big," and that you were concerned that the relationship wasn't going to work out. Their job is to help you. They aren't going to judge you or be upset with you; you are much more likely to cause problems or get in an uncomfortable situation if you lie now. Don't lie or play it down. You did nothing wrong, but you need to be honest. If they talk about finding a new big and you don't want one, just tell them that you are going to refrain from the program for the time being. They won't be upset.
babyboxfish
by Silver Member on Jan. 13, 2017 at 8:40 PM


Quoting Anonymous 2: Just be honest to them.


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