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Why is dating so hard?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 10 Replies
I feel like dating is so crazy now.. like with all this damn technology and having a job and child 80% of my communication is done through my phone. I don't want to waste time with guys that don't want the same thing I want so I talk to them for a while before going on a date... I either get ones who have a mental illness (depression, bipolar, anxiety) and it doesn't work out because I have anxiety and depression so I feed off their energy.. or I get the guys who are super sweet and seem really nice and I spend time with them and really start to like them and then they tell me they tell me they occasionally do cocaine.. or they live with their ex.. or just want sex.. 😞 I feel like I'm over trying this and just want to stay single forever.
Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 18, 2017 at 8:00 PM
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Replies (1-10):
mrsjules79
by Bronze Member on Jan. 18, 2017 at 8:03 PM
Because all of the older guys come with baggage. It truly sucks but what can you do? It's rough out there and since I'm not interested in dating anyone with small children it makes it even more difficult.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 18, 2017 at 9:17 PM
I don't mind small children but the only one I have interest in with a child lives with his ex so I'm concerned with that. Like he tells me daily he likes me and is crazy sweet but I don't want to get hurt.

Quoting mrsjules79: Because all of the older guys come with baggage. It truly sucks but what can you do? It's rough out there and since I'm not interested in dating anyone with small children it makes it even more difficult.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 18, 2017 at 11:10 PM
Bump
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 19, 2017 at 1:22 PM
Bump
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jan. 19, 2017 at 1:25 PM

girl im with you or u think things are going great and poof they ghost you. Or talk about their ex a lot (not over them yet) or are 'seperated' i.e. still married. It's insane. I give up.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jan. 19, 2017 at 1:32 PM
I barely bother with it because there are so many ridiculous "rules" now. You can't even get to know anyone because everyone's playing games. You can't text too soon after a date or text too soon after they text you because that proves you're desperate, easy, have no life, obsessed with them, etc. You don't even know who's supposed to pay anymore because some guys expect dutch all the time, some get offended if you even offer to pay your way, some want you to offer after X number of dates and good luck figuring out what X equals and so on. Then you've got the guys who can't get over their exes and keep them in their back pockets all the time as backup. And don't forget the ones who can't decide if they even want a relationship and the 50-somethings trying to relive their frat boy days.

Forget it. And honestly, I'm enjoying being single anyway. No one to answer to, no one to consider our have to compromise on with everything and no one to baby when they're sick.

Me? I'll have a nice laugh and roll in the bed with a younger guy when I'm bored. We both know it's just a temporary and fun thrill. No hurt or hard feelings. Just fun.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 19, 2017 at 2:44 PM
Yes!!! I was talking to someone and thought he went on about liking me and wanting something real and then poof. It makes me not even want to give anyone a try.

Quoting Anonymous 2:

girl im with you or u think things are going great and poof they ghost you. Or talk about their ex a lot (not over them yet) or are 'seperated' i.e. still married. It's insane. I give up.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 19, 2017 at 2:46 PM
Seriously so many rules! And so many people talking to numerous people.. like if you like me and you say we're "talking" don't be talking to other girls or at least tell me so I'm not wasting time or catching feelings.

Quoting Anonymous 3: I barely bother with it because there are so many ridiculous "rules" now. You can't even get to know anyone because everyone's playing games. You can't text too soon after a date or text too soon after they text you because that proves you're desperate, easy, have no life, obsessed with them, etc. You don't even know who's supposed to pay anymore because some guys expect dutch all the time, some get offended if you even offer to pay your way, some want you to offer after X number of dates and good luck figuring out what X equals and so on. Then you've got the guys who can't get over their exes and keep them in their back pockets all the time as backup. And don't forget the ones who can't decide if they even want a relationship and the 50-somethings trying to relive their frat boy days.

Forget it. And honestly, I'm enjoying being single anyway. No one to answer to, no one to consider our have to compromise on with everything and no one to baby when they're sick.

Me? I'll have a nice laugh and roll in the bed with a younger guy when I'm bored. We both know it's just a temporary and fun thrill. No hurt or hard feelings. Just fun.
tiafez
by Gold Member on Jan. 19, 2017 at 2:50 PM

my advice, from a been there and did that, live the life you love. join a club or volunteer. follow what you like. a book club or hiking group, take a class through continuing education, a solo parents group through your local church,  volunteer for something you love, sign on with your local community theater doing sets or something similar. Find your happy and the right person will be drawn to you. And if Mr Right doesn't show up through that, you've had fun and enjoyed yourself :)


Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 19, 2017 at 3:42 PM
Thanks!! That's really great advice.

Quoting tiafez:

my advice, from a been there and did that, live the life you love. join a club or volunteer. follow what you like. a book club or hiking group, take a class through continuing education, a solo parents group through your local church,  volunteer for something you love, sign on with your local community theater doing sets or something similar. Find your happy and the right person will be drawn to you. And if Mr Right doesn't show up through that, you've had fun and enjoyed yourself :)

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