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cousin can't see his baby

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 48 Replies

My cousin has a daughter who just turned 1 in january and he has not been a big part of her life, him and his wife gave up custody when she was only  a month old due to drugs. They rarely saw her but in November both were arrested , he was released last month and the wife is still in jail and they do not talk. He has been doing very good, he has been stayign with my uncle and stays home and has been trying to find a job but it is hard when we have no public transportation and he does not have a car or license. 

I messaged the wives parents two weeks back to tell them he wanted to see his daughter but everyone felt it would be best if the wives father was not present, my cousin wanted his dad to go pick her up and keep her for a few hours or have the wives mother bring her and she could be present but they did not want to do that, they want the wives dad to be their but my cousin and him do not get along so we worry a fight will break out and my cousin is on probation. 

They also said my cousin had to write and submit to them when and why he wanted to see his daughter , what the actual hell? It is his daughter and he is trying to get his life together and be a dad.  I told them we would be contacting her lawyer because my cousin thought since CPS got involved she was issued a lawyer but come to find out she was not.

Per court order they have to let my cousin see his daughter, he was given visitation and they are not abiding by that. The court house told him to contact the wives parents lawyer and tell her they are not abiding by the court order but being as she is thier lawyer im not sure she will actually do anything about it other then tell him to take them to court which is hard when he has no money to do so. 


Anyone have any experience with this type of thing? Can he file for visitation free or will it cost money?


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People need to stop being so judgemental , he is trying to get his life together and be a dad unlike his wife who is still in jail and we recently found out even though in jail she is still finding ways to get drugs. My cousin who is clean and trying to straighten up can not see his daughter yet they are taking her to see his wife in jail knowing she is still using. 

When I heard they gave her up I was happy, so was his dad because everyone worried somethign would happen to her but when he is clean and working on putting his life back together and now wants to be a dad to his daughter it is time to let him do that , especially when the paper clearly states he gets visitation. His dad is a good guy and will be present the whole time he has her and his dad deserves to see his grandchild , he has only seen her twice.

We live in a small town with not many jobs and no public transportation so yes he is struggling in that area but he is doing meetings and is at home all the time, he never goes out unless his dad goes with him or his brother.

People change, yes he may very well fall off the good path he is on and if that time comes then it comes and yes he should no longer be allowed near his daughter at that time but currently he is clean and doing good. 

Posted by Anonymous on Mar. 18, 2017 at 7:48 PM
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Replies (1-10):
hart57
by Ruby Member on Mar. 18, 2017 at 7:52 PM
2 moms liked this
If he has court ordered visitation he doesn't need to file for it.

Sounds like he lost all rights when he went to jail. Just because it's his kid doesn't mean he should get to see her. He messed up and lost custody of his own kid.

If he has visitation orders he can call the police I guess. But he should get an attorney. He can talk to his probation offer about help finding a job. And I hope he is getting help for drug issues.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Mar. 18, 2017 at 7:54 PM
1 mom liked this

IF he has a court order granting him visition rights and they refuse to comply, they are in contempt of court. What I don't understand is how he has a court order with visition rights when he and his wife "gave up custody" of their child. Are the grandparents legal guardians while CPS handles the case? IF CPS is involved, is there a family plan? Are the grandparents, in denying him visitation rights, violating the family plan? If that is the case, he may or may not stand a better chance going through CPS to enforce the visitation rather than through the courts, if he has no money. Either way, he has a battle on his hands. Fathers don't always get fair treatment when it comes to their kids. 

quinnsmom715
by Ruby Member on Mar. 18, 2017 at 7:58 PM
1 mom liked this

aw poor drug addict cant see his daughter..my heart bleeds for him.no,seriously,tell him to get it together before he fucks up his kids life again..

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Mar. 18, 2017 at 7:58 PM
I'm confused by the situation. He needs to go to court and state they are violating a court order.
Danesmommy1
by Grammar Enthusiast on Mar. 18, 2017 at 8:00 PM
4 moms liked this
Yeah, I wouldn't go out of my way to let a loser drug addict see a baby in my care either.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Mar. 18, 2017 at 8:11 PM
You don't want the wife's dad to be there because he's on probation and fight might break out? Suck it up! I've managed to go my whole life with never fighting someone, I'm certain he can suck it up and be the bigger person for the sake of his child.
mcsmom1
by Silver Member on Mar. 18, 2017 at 8:14 PM
1 mom liked this

If he can't be a mature enough adult to not get into an altercation with the man who is taking care of his child, maybe he doesn't need to see her?

He needs to get a job and hire an attorney.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 18, 2017 at 8:15 PM

The wives father is a very unpleasant person and instigates 

Quoting Anonymous 4: You don't want the wife's dad to be there because he's on probation and fight might break out? Suck it up! I've managed to go my whole life with never fighting someone, I'm certain he can suck it up and be the bigger person for the sake of his child.


Elle.tea.22
by Emerald Member on Mar. 18, 2017 at 8:16 PM
He's a loser any way, baby is better off without them
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 18, 2017 at 8:18 PM

Judgemental much? It is his baby and he has a right to see her and he has been clean for almost 5 months. 

Believe me when I heard they no longer had custody I was beyond happy , even his own dad was because we were so afraid something was going to happen to her but when he is trying to get his life together and be a dad then it is time to let him see his child and allow him to make an effort. His father will be present the entire time and they have no reason to keep the baby from her grandfather. He has only got to see her twice

Quoting Danesmommy1: Yeah, I wouldn't go out of my way to let a loser drug addict see a baby in my care either.


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