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Long lost relative?

Posted by on Apr. 10, 2017 at 11:28 AM
  • 12 Replies
I may have met someone related to me yesterday. It's either a crazy coincidence or this lady was my dad's cousin.

A little backstory. My bio grandfather left my grandmother when my dad was two months old. We were never allowed to talk about bio grandfather. My grandma kept the last name though. In 2013, my dad passed away from cancer. About a year after, my brothers, our one cousin (that I haven't seen since I was four), and our half uncle were notified that bio grandfather passes three months after my dad and his Long estate was being foreclosed and we were able to put a bid in. My half uncle was in a horrible accident and doesn't even remember who he is, let alone bio grandfather. My grandmother and uncle died when I was young.

Here's where it gets weird. My family is originally from NYC. Both my parents werw born and raised in Brooklyn. When I was 8, we moved to Northeast PA in a gated community. Many NYers retire and move up here or vacation. We used to get mail from a family with the same last name. They asked if we were somehow related, but things didn't line up, until yesterday.

DH and I did a memorial kayak race in town. One of DHs aunt's BIL was hanging out with us. DH and I recently married. He asked what my maiden name was. Turns out his wife had the same maiden name, originally from Brooklyn, her parents were the family our mail would get mixed up with, and my parents were friends with them.

Later on that day, I met the wife. We talked and I said about how I don't know the side of my family where my maiden name comes from because bio grandfather died. She told me her uncle that she didn't know well died in 2013 on Long Island.

Now I want to go about trying to see if somehow she is related to me. They live down the road from us and we see them at family events with DHs side. I just can't imagine how can just be a coincidence.
by on Apr. 10, 2017 at 11:28 AM
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Replies (1-10):
krislovejmt
by Pirate Wench on Apr. 10, 2017 at 11:32 AM
1 mom liked this

Weird. I wouldn't be able to leave that alone. I'd have to find out everything. Good luck!

carterscutie85
by Queen Bee on Apr. 10, 2017 at 11:34 AM

That's super weird. I wonder if you could get a DNA test that would show some type of relation? I don't know how far tests can go as far as determining those things though.

OliRye1234
by Ruby Member on Apr. 10, 2017 at 11:40 AM
Oh I'm not. There almost no living relatives on my dad's side. I don't know a quarter of my family history.

One more crazy piece of this, DH joked around yesterday and said I need to get more cousins to keep up with his, before we started talking to this guy. DH has around 120 first cousins. I have 7.

Quoting krislovejmt:

Weird. I wouldn't be able to leave that alone. I'd have to find out everything. Good luck!

OliRye1234
by Ruby Member on Apr. 10, 2017 at 11:43 AM
I'm going to message DHs one aunt that the family tree. She does a yearly calander for DHs side. I know the names of the lady I met and her parents' name. Both her parents passed away a couple years ago.

Quoting carterscutie85:

That's super weird. I wonder if you could get a DNA test that would show some type of relation? I don't know how far tests can go as far as determining those things though.

krislovejmt
by Pirate Wench on Apr. 10, 2017 at 11:50 AM

My grandmother had mental disabilities and everything she told us about her family was a lie. We found out after she died a few years ago that she was an abandoned baby that was pretty much passed around the town she lived in until she was 16 and a marriage was arranged for her. It's like she made up this fantasy of what she thought her life should have been like and pretended it was fact. It's been hell to work everything out and track down the truth but we're making progress!

Quoting OliRye1234: Oh I'm not. There almost no living relatives on my dad's side. I don't know a quarter of my family history. One more crazy piece of this, DH joked around yesterday and said I need to get more cousins to keep up with his, before we started talking to this guy. DH has around 120 first cousins. I have 7.
Quoting krislovejmt:

Weird. I wouldn't be able to leave that alone. I'd have to find out everything. Good luck!


OliRye1234
by Ruby Member on Apr. 10, 2017 at 11:53 AM
Did you go through any genealogy resources? I'm not sure how to really start this.

Quoting krislovejmt:

My grandmother had mental disabilities and everything she told us about her family was a lie. We found out after she died a few years ago that she was an abandoned baby that was pretty much passed around the town she lived in until she was 16 and a marriage was arranged for her. It's like she made up this fantasy of what she thought her life should have been like and pretended it was fact. It's been hell to work everything out and track down the truth but we're making progress!

Quoting OliRye1234: Oh I'm not. There almost no living relatives on my dad's side. I don't know a quarter of my family history.

One more crazy piece of this, DH joked around yesterday and said I need to get more cousins to keep up with his, before we started talking to this guy. DH has around 120 first cousins. I have 7.

Quoting krislovejmt:

Weird. I wouldn't be able to leave that alone. I'd have to find out everything. Good luck!

krislovejmt
by Pirate Wench on Apr. 10, 2017 at 12:01 PM

My mom went on ancestry.com and familytree.com. Those are probably a good starting place. I've mostly been scouring old documents and talking to family members.

Quoting OliRye1234: Did you go through any genealogy resources? I'm not sure how to really start this.
Quoting krislovejmt:

My grandmother had mental disabilities and everything she told us about her family was a lie. We found out after she died a few years ago that she was an abandoned baby that was pretty much passed around the town she lived in until she was 16 and a marriage was arranged for her. It's like she made up this fantasy of what she thought her life should have been like and pretended it was fact. It's been hell to work everything out and track down the truth but we're making progress!

Quoting OliRye1234: Oh I'm not. There almost no living relatives on my dad's side. I don't know a quarter of my family history. One more crazy piece of this, DH joked around yesterday and said I need to get more cousins to keep up with his, before we started talking to this guy. DH has around 120 first cousins. I have 7.
Quoting krislovejmt:

Weird. I wouldn't be able to leave that alone. I'd have to find out everything. Good luck!



OliRye1234
by Ruby Member on Apr. 10, 2017 at 12:02 PM
I'll check those out tonight. Thank you.

Quoting krislovejmt:

My mom went on ancestry.com and familytree.com. Those are probably a good starting place. I've mostly been scouring old documents and talking to family members.

Quoting OliRye1234: Did you go through any genealogy resources? I'm not sure how to really start this.

Quoting krislovejmt:

My grandmother had mental disabilities and everything she told us about her family was a lie. We found out after she died a few years ago that she was an abandoned baby that was pretty much passed around the town she lived in until she was 16 and a marriage was arranged for her. It's like she made up this fantasy of what she thought her life should have been like and pretended it was fact. It's been hell to work everything out and track down the truth but we're making progress!

Quoting OliRye1234: Oh I'm not. There almost no living relatives on my dad's side. I don't know a quarter of my family history.

One more crazy piece of this, DH joked around yesterday and said I need to get more cousins to keep up with his, before we started talking to this guy. DH has around 120 first cousins. I have 7.

Quoting krislovejmt:

Weird. I wouldn't be able to leave that alone. I'd have to find out everything. Good luck!

krislovejmt
by Pirate Wench on Apr. 10, 2017 at 12:04 PM

Glad to help ^_^

Quoting OliRye1234: I'll check those out tonight. Thank you.
Quoting krislovejmt:

My mom went on ancestry.com and familytree.com. Those are probably a good starting place. I've mostly been scouring old documents and talking to family members.

Quoting OliRye1234: Did you go through any genealogy resources? I'm not sure how to really start this.
Quoting krislovejmt:

My grandmother had mental disabilities and everything she told us about her family was a lie. We found out after she died a few years ago that she was an abandoned baby that was pretty much passed around the town she lived in until she was 16 and a marriage was arranged for her. It's like she made up this fantasy of what she thought her life should have been like and pretended it was fact. It's been hell to work everything out and track down the truth but we're making progress!

Quoting OliRye1234: Oh I'm not. There almost no living relatives on my dad's side. I don't know a quarter of my family history. One more crazy piece of this, DH joked around yesterday and said I need to get more cousins to keep up with his, before we started talking to this guy. DH has around 120 first cousins. I have 7.
Quoting krislovejmt:

Weird. I wouldn't be able to leave that alone. I'd have to find out everything. Good luck!




taiyo218
by Platinum Member on Apr. 10, 2017 at 12:07 PM
That'd be cool to find out, sorry for the loss of your dad.
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