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DS 16 ruined his whole life by getting married when the baby probaby isnt even his!

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 21 Replies

DS came to me and told me today that he got married. A few weeks ago he told us he might have got a girl pregnant. He had slept with her once but she had a boyfriend. The boyfriend found out and left her now she is "100% sure" DS is the father

DS might be the father. At this point we have no way to know. This girl keeps changing how far along she is. For all we know she isnt even pregnant. Her parents refuse to talk to us about it. 

DS and her cant even remember exactly when they had sex. They used a condom and so chances are it inst my son which is exactly what I told him. (She had regular unprotected sex with her boyfriend) 

When DS told my ex my ex thought it was great! He thought it was amazing that there would be another addition to the family. His reaction alone made me cringe. 

DS said he was going to kinda keep his distance until he knows for sure he is the father. Well I guess that changed because they decided to get married. I have a feeling that my ex pushed for it. He did the same when I got pregnant with DS and I refused to marry him. He feels like parents should always be married. He told DS that his kid would be better off in a home where his/her parents are together and in love

Now I could understand that more IF my son and this girl were together. They have never even gone on a date before. They hardly know each other. The whole thing is just so crazy. I fell like I am in a crazy dream. 

DS doesnt even know he is the father. The chances are against him and even if he is that doesnt mean they should get married just because. 

I thought both parents had to sign off to get married but nope, here in Nevada you only need one. I had to verify with my lawyer that it was true because I just couldnt believe it

I dont even know where to go from here. His plans are for him and her to live with my ex. I doubt he will last long living with his dad full time though.  When the baby comes he will legally be the father no matter what, even if the baby isnt biologically his. 


Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 21, 2017 at 9:47 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Apr. 21, 2017 at 9:48 AM

Ive read this before.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Apr. 21, 2017 at 9:49 AM
Perfect now that they are married he will have to pay child support reguardless of if hes the father or not
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 21, 2017 at 9:51 AM

Yep. He doesnt even understand that. Even if they prove the baby isnt his he is stuck paying child support no matter what. I am worried that her and her ex will get back together when the baby is born and be a "happy family" and DS will still have to be paying child support

Quoting Anonymous 3: Perfect now that they are married he will have to pay child support reguardless of if hes the father or not


owl0210
by Emerald Member on Apr. 21, 2017 at 9:52 AM
This didn't happen.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Apr. 21, 2017 at 9:52 AM
Most likely you're right. I'd tell him not to sign the birth certificate until its proven

Quoting Anonymous 1:

Yep. He doesnt even understand that. Even if they prove the baby isnt his he is stuck paying child support no matter what. I am worried that her and her ex will get back together when the baby is born and be a "happy family" and DS will still have to be paying child support

Quoting Anonymous 3: Perfect now that they are married he will have to pay child support reguardless of if hes the father or not

left.drowning
by Ruby Member on Apr. 21, 2017 at 9:53 AM
Well. This is new
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 21, 2017 at 9:54 AM

If they are married the birth certificate wont matter. Legally he will be the father. 

Quoting Anonymous 3: Most likely you're right. I'd tell him not to sign the birth certificate until its proven
Quoting Anonymous 1:

Yep. He doesnt even understand that. Even if they prove the baby isnt his he is stuck paying child support no matter what. I am worried that her and her ex will get back together when the baby is born and be a "happy family" and DS will still have to be paying child support

Quoting Anonymous 3: Perfect now that they are married he will have to pay child support reguardless of if hes the father or not



SueWanda
by Gold Member on Apr. 21, 2017 at 9:55 AM
Idk about Nevada but here in Virginia a spouse is the presumed father and doesn't need to sign the BC.

Quoting Anonymous 3: Most likely you're right. I'd tell him not to sign the birth certificate until its proven

Quoting Anonymous 1:

Yep. He doesnt even understand that. Even if they prove the baby isnt his he is stuck paying child support no matter what. I am worried that her and her ex will get back together when the baby is born and be a "happy family" and DS will still have to be paying child support

Quoting Anonymous 3: Perfect now that they are married he will have to pay child support reguardless of if hes the father or not

hotspice58
by Platinum Member on Apr. 21, 2017 at 9:56 AM

This.  I told my son the same thing even though he's older.

Quoting Anonymous 1:

If they are married the birth certificate wont matter. Legally he will be the father. 

Quoting Anonymous 3: Most likely you're right. I'd tell him not to sign the birth certificate until its proven
Quoting Anonymous 1:

Yep. He doesnt even understand that. Even if they prove the baby isnt his he is stuck paying child support no matter what. I am worried that her and her ex will get back together when the baby is born and be a "happy family" and DS will still have to be paying child support

Quoting Anonymous 3: Perfect now that they are married he will have to pay child support reguardless of if hes the father or not




SAHMJC
by Emerald Member on Apr. 21, 2017 at 9:56 AM
Unfortunately at this point there's not much you can do. Even if you convinced him it was the right thing to do he cannot divorce her while she is pregnant. So legally the child is going to be his. In some states he would be able to take a paternity test and be let off the hook but in some states unless the biological father willingly signs the birth certificate he's on the hook. So my guess at this point is the only thing you can do is be supportive. Be there for him. Don't let him feel like you've turned your back on him because chances are things will get bad and he's going to need you.
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