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Sometimes I get insecure about my relationship and I don't know why..

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 16 Replies
My bf is really good to me. He's consistent and we spend a lot of time together. We don't live together, but there's only a couple days a week we don't see each other usually. He calls me on his way home from work pretty much everyday.

Well, he's in the military reserves and has to work one weekend a month. I know he's been tired working all weekend and he told me in advance he'd be grouchy/ tired and not much for talking. So, I've kind of done my own thing all weekend and he's called me but he didn't last night. I know he probably just went to bed, but I can't help but feel insecure. I've always fought neediness in relationships and I've worked very hard not to confront him when I feel needy as it's my problem and not his.

Doing so, has made me feel less and less insecure on our relationship and it doesn't happen as often anymore, but im feeling g it today :(. I just wish it would go away.
Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 24, 2017 at 7:58 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 24, 2017 at 8:02 AM
Bump
owl0210
by Sapphire Member on Apr. 24, 2017 at 8:04 AM
I always say trust your intuition if you feel something is off but if you have dealt with insecurities in other relationships then it may be time for therapy to find out why you are having these issues.
Melissa_4
by Navy Mom on Apr. 24, 2017 at 8:07 AM

Have you talked to a therapist about this?  It's great that you're feeling more secure in the relationship, but you should probably get to the bottom of why it happens, especially since you've identified it as a pattern with you.

Your bf sounds like a great guy.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 24, 2017 at 8:10 AM
I grew up in a household where my mom always depended ok men for her happiness. I also felt abandoned when my brother chose to go live with my dad. I have a needy/ codependent type personality. I've healed a lot from it however I know I'll always struggle against my demons.

Quoting Melissa_4:

Have you talked to a therapist about this?  It's great that you're feeling more secure in the relationship, but you should probably get to the bottom of why it happens, especially since you've identified it as a pattern with you.

Your bf sounds like a great guy.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Apr. 24, 2017 at 8:15 AM
Get a hobby to occupy your time.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 24, 2017 at 8:16 AM
It's not about that. I have plenty of friends and hobbies which I occupy myself with.

Quoting Anonymous 2: Get a hobby to occupy your time.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Apr. 24, 2017 at 8:17 AM

He's tired from his weekend warrior "training"!!??! All they do is clean their guns and talk shit. He's just tired of your whining!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 24, 2017 at 8:20 AM
You obviously have no insight on the matter.

Quoting Anonymous 3:

He's tired from his weekend warrior "training"!!??! All they do is clean their guns and talk shit. He's just tired of your whining!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Apr. 24, 2017 at 8:29 AM
You are so wrong it's not even funny.

Quoting Anonymous 3:

He's tired from his weekend warrior "training"!!??! All they do is clean their guns and talk shit. He's just tired of your whining!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 24, 2017 at 8:40 AM
My boyfriend works to make sure all the equipment is working properly. It's also tied in with his civilian job. It's quite stressful and he is kept very busy/ stressed the whole time. He's constantly frustrated with work.


Also, I don't whine to him. Lol. It says that in my post. I never bring it up. If he doesn't call/ text, I just let it go. So, this poster has no idea what she's even talking about.

Quoting Anonymous 4: You are so wrong it's not even funny.

Quoting Anonymous 3:

He's tired from his weekend warrior "training"!!??! All they do is clean their guns and talk shit. He's just tired of your whining!

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