Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Am I wrong for wanting my child to have MY last name?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 276 Replies
1 mom liked this


My unborn child's father is a good guy but we've decided a romantic relationship will not be happening for us in the future.

I've decided to give my child my last name instead of the father. Some say i shouldn't do that while others think I have every right but am i wrong.

Opinions? Pros or cons?


Posted by Anonymous on May. 19, 2017 at 12:36 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
STVUstudent
by Platinum Member on May. 19, 2017 at 12:39 PM
23 moms liked this

I say, give the child YOUR name.  You are not in a relationship with the father, but you WILL be in a relationship with your child.

OrangeBalloon
by Ruby Member on May. 19, 2017 at 12:39 PM
5 moms liked this

Is he going to be involved in her life? If so I think I would consider giving her his name. He IS her father after all. You didn't make her by yourself. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on May. 19, 2017 at 12:39 PM
2 moms liked this
My oldest has my last name. My ex was furious but I didn't care. We weren't married. Kid got my name. End of story. I never cared what he or anyone else thought about it.
SAHMJC
by Emerald Member on May. 19, 2017 at 12:40 PM
6 moms liked this
I think the child should have the last name of the person who will be their primary caregiver. It makes it a lot easier. I unfortunately did not do this. I gave my daughter her biological father's last name. She is 10 years old and hasn't seen him in 5years and still it's a fight in court to get her last name changed to my husband's. It's always an awkward conversation every time and I hate being called mrs. Her last name.
lollip0p
by Ruby Member on May. 19, 2017 at 12:40 PM
5 moms liked this
No, not wrong at all. I don't understand ppl who think kids should have the dad's last name. Makes no sense to me
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on May. 19, 2017 at 12:40 PM
10 moms liked this
Think of it this way one day your ex will probably get married. Do you want his wife to have the same last name as your child while you don't?
olivejuice2
by Gold Member on May. 19, 2017 at 12:41 PM
1 mom liked this
You're not wrong and I don't see why anyone other than you and the dad would care what the kid's last name is.
kewimom
by Silver Member on May. 19, 2017 at 12:41 PM
3 moms liked this

I have always felt unless you are married the child should have the mothers name.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on May. 19, 2017 at 12:42 PM
8 moms liked this
So? She's her mother and obviously she's going to be in her life? Why do dads get benefits for doing stuff that's automatically expected of moms? If they're both going to be in the child's life but Mom's most likely going to be more involved it makes sense that the child gets mom's last name. Not to mention mom's the one who's going through pregnancy and delivery

Quoting OrangeBalloon:

Is he going to be involved in her life? If so I think I would consider giving her his name. He IS her father after all. You didn't make her by yourself. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on May. 19, 2017 at 12:42 PM
1 mom liked this
I agree 100%. My oldest has my name.

Quoting SAHMJC: I think the child should have the last name of the person who will be their primary caregiver. It makes it a lot easier. I unfortunately did not do this. I gave my daughter her biological father's last name. She is 10 years old and hasn't seen him in 5years and still it's a fight in court to get her last name changed to my husband's. It's always an awkward conversation every time and I hate being called mrs. Her last name.
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN