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I'm sorry but you didn't care about him when he was alive you're not getting money now

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 14 Replies
Dh died unexpectedly in November. While he didnt have a life insurance policy we did have a few assets. I've since sold those assets or am in the process of selling them and I contacted his ex wife to let her know I would be adding to the savings account for the two youngest for college. The kids are both 16, while I'm not obligated to do that, I'm choosing to because that's what Dh would want and I want to see them both succeed.

Dh and his ex also have an older child who's 26 and decided to write her father from her life because after she flunked out of two colleges - university and a community college- he refused to give her any more money. She hasn't spoken to her father in 4 years and refused to attend his funeral.

When speaking to his ex I never mentioned the oldest, I just said that I had added money to their college accounts from the sale of the rental homes.

She asked about money for the oldest and I told her I hadn't set any aside for her. She became upset with me and told me that was cruel and unfair and that she deserved the same amount as the other two. I didn't argue with her, I just simply said I'm sorry you feel that way. I must go now and then I hung the phone up.

She told the oldest what happened and I assume she gave her my cell because the girl called me demanding to know where her money was. I just hung up the phone, she then sent me texts demanding her money and cursing at me until I finally blocked her number.

I'm sorry she's upset about the money but I'm not budging.
Posted by Anonymous on May. 26, 2017 at 6:14 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on May. 26, 2017 at 6:17 PM
You are doing what your husband would have done if he was alive helping his youngest with school. I'm sorry for your loss.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 26, 2017 at 6:20 PM
Thank you, I think I'm finally coming out of the fog. When it first happened I was on cruise control. I really don't remember much from November until about march of this year.

Quoting Anonymous 2: You are doing what your husband would have done if he was alive helping his youngest with school. I'm sorry for your loss.
Tigress22304
by Ruby Member on May. 26, 2017 at 6:21 PM

Just block her phone number. Along with BM's number.

That's quite shitty of the adult daughter to demand something she's not entitled to.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on May. 26, 2017 at 6:21 PM
His ex should just be grateful you are giving the two younger ones money. You could've kept it all to yourself.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on May. 26, 2017 at 6:24 PM
Did you already have info to make the deposits? If so, why call to inform her anyway?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on May. 26, 2017 at 6:25 PM
Wow his oldest is very entitled sounding and his ex wife is no better. It is wonderful that you are doing what your DH would have wanted even though you don't need to do anything.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 26, 2017 at 6:26 PM
Because I felt she needed to know. She adds money herself and the next time she looked she would have seen a deposit that she didn't make. Instead of waiting for her to find it and call me I decided it was better to just call her.

Quoting Anonymous 4: Did you already have info to make the deposits? If so, why call to inform her anyway?
ranchmama21
by Gold Member on May. 26, 2017 at 6:35 PM
Can the ex wife take some of that money to give to the eldest?

I agree with your decision.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 26, 2017 at 6:37 PM
i don't know. I'm not sure what sort of accounts they set up for their kids.



Quoting ranchmama21: Can the ex wife take some of that money to give to the eldest?

I agree with your decision.
AnotherKim
by Ruby Member on May. 26, 2017 at 6:42 PM

I'm so sorry for your loss. I think you're doing the right thing. You're making sure the younger two are taken care of. The oldest blew her portion when she flunked out of college. Bummer for her.

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