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Would this hold up in court?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 51 Replies
I'm divorcing DH. I've had it with his manipulation and mental abuse. I'm fine with 50/50 custody and him not paying child support as long as he pays before and after care for the kids. I was a SAHM and I'm trying to get back on my feet and it'd be impossible to keep my job without before and after care, and no, no one is around at the time the kids get off the bus.

Anyway, DH says he'd tell the judge I'm unfit to have 50/50 due to depression. I'm not actually suicidal, but I've texted him everyone would be better off if I ended it all or ran away. I never want to actually leave my kids. They're my everything. I take care of them tge entire time they are with me. DH is never home due to work or him wanting to show me he doesn't need me and go out and leave me with the kids. Like tonight, he told me to take the whole bottle of my medication and drink myself to death and left. I have our children with me. He says I'm unstable but leaves me any chance he gets with the kids alone.

Would he have a legal leg to stand on when claiming I'm mentally unfit and dangerous yet will leave me alone, by choice, with the kids?
Posted by Anonymous on May. 26, 2017 at 6:47 PM
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Replies (1-10):
GentleHeartsPA
by Lanie on May. 26, 2017 at 6:50 PM
The fact that he is mentally abusive plays a big part in why you have depression. That is something you need to make clear in your court documents.
Im guessing that you are leaving before filing for divorce?
If so then you out in thw documents that ever aince your seperation your mindset has been much stronger and your confidence has been coming back.
-White.Rabbit-
by Gold Member on May. 26, 2017 at 6:51 PM

You both are but no, I doubt he has anything major on you since I know way more fucked up folks that still have their children.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on May. 26, 2017 at 6:52 PM

First starters stop saying/texting stuff like that.  He can make things hard for you and ask for a psych evaluation.  Which may not be a bad thing.  If he does you ask for one on him.

MissAndree
by Nosuchthing on May. 26, 2017 at 6:53 PM
1 mom liked this

I would start seeing a therapist and have documentation ready and available to submit to the court of my mental fitness just in case he tried to paint me in that light. I would also start recording him and catch him saying things like take your whole bottle of pills and then leaving the children with you. I don't know your state laws, so I don't know if the recordings are admissable in court, but it can't hurt to have them in case they are. 

PinkButterfly66
by Diamond Member on May. 26, 2017 at 6:54 PM

I would be proactive and get that mental abuse documented.  And I would go for full physical custody, child support and spousal support and make the bastard pay out of his ass for every day he abused you.  Get the best shark for lawyer that you can.

Littlebunnyfufu
by Platinum Member on May. 26, 2017 at 6:54 PM
First, look into legal aide

Second, I would document the amount of time he leaves you with the kids to make that point. Also, are you in therapy for the depression? I would start (if he tries to block you document that too)

Depending on how long ago that text was, if you are in treatment, and how often he voluntarily leaves you to care for the children you have a solid argument that his assertion is incorrect.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 26, 2017 at 6:55 PM
I'm trying to leave. I haven't been able to get enough strength and stop crying long enough to pack anything. I'm not allowed to have any emotions or I'm crazy or hormonal to him. I'll admit, I just got my period, but I was crying because I realized how little he values me. I have to give up my dream career, what I've been working towards and graduated for last night, because I won't make enough for before and after care along with bills and he said he will not support me getting in more student loan debt to actually get to the point I'd have a career to pay back my loans.

Quoting GentleHeartsPA: The fact that he is mentally abusive plays a big part in why you have depression. That is something you need to make clear in your court documents.
Im guessing that you are leaving before filing for divorce?
If so then you out in thw documents that ever aince your seperation your mindset has been much stronger and your confidence has been coming back.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on May. 26, 2017 at 6:56 PM
It looks bad for you because he has written documentation and it will be hard to prove the mental abuse.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 26, 2017 at 6:56 PM
Both are what?

Quoting -White.Rabbit-:

You both are but no, I doubt he has anything major on you since I know way more fucked up folks that still have their children.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 26, 2017 at 6:57 PM
It was over two years ago but I guess he saved the text.

Quoting Anonymous 2:

First starters stop saying/texting stuff like that.  He can make things hard for you and ask for a psych evaluation.  Which may not be a bad thing.  If he does you ask for one on him.

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