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Should I work less?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 7 Replies
I work full time managing a team of 7 people, I am raising 2 kids alone and I take care of the house alone as well. I go to the gym 3 times a week, take the kids to tennis lessons on Saturday morning, piano lessons on wednesdays, Most of our vegetables I grow at home or I buy strictly at regional farmer's market so I can plan and cook a very healthy meal every day for me and my kids, and I try to balance everything out, also to spend quality time with my boyfriend. Ex husband barely takes the kids, so it's really hard to manage everything.
I wake up at 6:30 every day and by the time the kids are in bed I am absolutely utterly exhausted but overall my life is great, I am doing really well at work, I have everything I could possibly want, I have an amazing boyfriend and we are planning on moving in together soon.
I really like to take care of the house, even if I get a maid I'd still like to do all the meal planning and cooking and taking care of the things at home which, I am sure will be a lot more once we move in to our new house.
I also love my job, I had 2 promotions in less than 2 years and I am very valuable to the company that has grown a lot lately and I am proud to say I played a big role in this.
Talking with my boyfriend he mentioned that maybe I could consider working a bit less. It's not that he wants to or that he doesn't want me to work, but he sees how exhausted I am every day and since money is not an issue he basically said that if I wanted to work part time or even not work at all, that'd be totally fine.
I would not like to stop working because I love my job and I want to have a career but I am afraid that if I don't stop this exhausting rhythm I may collapse at some point or have some sort of burn out.
What do you think?
Posted by Anonymous on Jun. 4, 2017 at 10:28 AM
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Replies (1-7):
K3412
by Platinum Member on Jun. 4, 2017 at 10:30 AM
1 mom liked this
You need to find some kind of balance so that you don't get burnt out. Eventually something will give, and it could be your sanity. I would consider what is least important to you and let it go.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jun. 4, 2017 at 10:38 AM

I think you should cut back on the boyfriend! You have children to concentrate on. You have a great career that affords you to be independent and have luxuries. He's not your husband and he is advising you to cut back on your work and income...that sounds fishy to me. He has no legal or moral obligation to support you. 

Think about this...you move in with him, you work less, you make less money and then he leaves you. Or he quits his job, or gets fired, or dies. What do you do then?? As a single Mom, you have to consider your children first. If you put yourself in a position where your financial means goes down and something happens with this boyfriend...you're fucked! 

You sound like a smart woman...don't make a stupid choice to lower yourself for a "Boyfriend"!

beco8627
by Platinum Member on Jun. 4, 2017 at 10:40 AM
This!

Quoting Anonymous 2:

I think you should cut back on the boyfriend! You have children to concentrate on. You have a great career that affords you to be independent and have luxuries. He's not your husband and he is advising you to cut back on your work and income...that sounds fishy to me. He has no legal or moral obligation to support you. 

Think about this...you move in with him, you work less, you make less money and then he leaves you. Or he quits his job, or gets fired, or dies. What do you do then?? As a single Mom, you have to consider your children first. If you put yourself in a position where your financial means goes down and something happens with this boyfriend...you're fucked! 

You sound like a smart woman...don't make a stupid choice to lower yourself for a "Boyfriend"!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jun. 4, 2017 at 10:56 AM
I was afraid this was going to me misinterpreted.
I can totally support myself and the kids even if I work part time. I don't need him supporting me and I have investments that could even be enough if I lost my job. Also, the house will be owned by both of us.
He's just worried about me asking way too much of myself and he thinks that if I worked less I would have more time for the kids and to do more things just for me, which is true. He's not pushing me to do anything, he's just worried because he sees how exhausted I am.
I am just struggling with the idea of not working full time and what this could mean to my career.

Quoting beco8627: This!

Quoting Anonymous 2:

I think you should cut back on the boyfriend! You have children to concentrate on. You have a great career that affords you to be independent and have luxuries. He's not your husband and he is advising you to cut back on your work and income...that sounds fishy to me. He has no legal or moral obligation to support you. 

Think about this...you move in with him, you work less, you make less money and then he leaves you. Or he quits his job, or gets fired, or dies. What do you do then?? As a single Mom, you have to consider your children first. If you put yourself in a position where your financial means goes down and something happens with this boyfriend...you're fucked! 

You sound like a smart woman...don't make a stupid choice to lower yourself for a "Boyfriend"!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jun. 4, 2017 at 11:04 AM
1 mom liked this

I think hiring a maid would be a better choice for you right now.

Asking you to quit working full-time at a successful career is a red flag, btw. Don't do it, and I would reevaluate whether this relationship adds value to your life.

weeping_angel
by Don't Blink on Jun. 4, 2017 at 11:07 AM
Hell no I wouldn't take a step back. You really want to become dependent on a boyfriend?
LightItUp
by RitatheGreat on Jun. 4, 2017 at 11:08 AM


Quoting K3412: You need to find some kind of balance so that you don't get burnt out. Eventually something will give, and it could be your sanity. I would consider what is least important to you and let it go.
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