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DH is a workaholic, am I being too sensitive?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 95 Replies
DH finally got a job in his trade, he is a mechanic.
He loves it and I love that he is doing something he is happy with.
But he tends to stay an hour or 2 after work through out the week then comes home eats dinner and sleeps for an hour and then gets up around 9 for maybe an hour and a half.
he volunteers to go in on Saturdays and it's the same routine.
Sunday's he has off and we go to church.
We went on a date on Friday for dinner (his idea) and when we got home he started immediately working in the garage.
Saturday he came home and at 6 and took a shower and then said he was going to lay down. I sighed because I miss him.
His reply was 'what? We had date night last night'
Today after church he of course went to lay down and i asked him not to spend all day in bed that I would like to go for a bike ride.
His reply was we just spent all morning together.
He tells me he loves me all the time , when he is home and awake he cuddles with me on the couch.
I'm just starting to feel like we don't get a lot of time together for our first year of marriage.
Am I being too sensitive?

Good example. We are just talking and he said he would like to go for a bike ride. Ok im all for it.
Then he said we needed groceries.
I said well we can go for a bike ride and then go get groceries.
Nope. He doesnt feel like going for a bike ride now.
Just wants to get the groceries.

So normal daily things are ok but trying to spemd time together doing something active is out of the question.
Even though he went in to the garage on date night to work on my bike so we could go bike riding this weekend.
Its frustrating
Posted by Anonymous on Jun. 18, 2017 at 3:14 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jun. 18, 2017 at 3:18 PM

Yes. Where are the kids when all of this is going on?

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jun. 18, 2017 at 3:19 PM
DS is 16

Quoting Anonymous 2:

Yes. Where are the kids when all of this is going on?

corticosteroid
by Sapphire Member on Jun. 18, 2017 at 3:20 PM

What is it you'd like to be doing?

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jun. 18, 2017 at 3:23 PM
Going for a walk or actually bike riding, I dont mind if he is off in another room where he is doing something and i am doing something but us being able to at least talk back and forth.
I think the comments bother me more though it makes me feel like I have to schedule time with him and be happy with the time I'm allotted

Quoting corticosteroid:

What is it you'd like to be doing?

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jun. 18, 2017 at 3:25 PM
1 mom liked this

It sounds like he spends time with you when it's convenient for him.  Life is too short for that nonsense.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Jun. 18, 2017 at 3:25 PM
Sounds like he has a sleeping problem not a working to much problem. Does he not sleep well at night?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jun. 18, 2017 at 3:27 PM
He sleeps fine at night I know his job is hard Labour for him so it wears him out. I took take that into consideration. I think it's the comments that bother me more

Quoting Anonymous 4: Sounds like he has a sleeping problem not a working to much problem. Does he not sleep well at night?
onethentwins
by Ruby Member on Jun. 18, 2017 at 3:27 PM

I understand where you're coming from.  I never wanted a man who worked long hours, even if that meant a lot of money, because I wanted someone to be with.  I don't think he's taking your needs into consideration.  Friday night and Sunday morning sounds more like dating than marriage. 

If I were you I'd tell him I'm glad he got the job he loves, but you need more time together to be happy. See what it says.  Also, I'd think about if there's a reason he doesn't want to be around me and make sure that he does.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jun. 18, 2017 at 3:30 PM
We get along fine. Even if i, disappointed I do my best not too show it. I work as well but since I get home first i make dinner. He compliments me every night on my cooking and tells me I'm so great and he is so lucky.
We don't have big arguments. We have disagreements the odd time but we talk them out pretty good

Quoting onethentwins:

I understand where you're coming from.  I never wanted a man who worked long hours, even if that meant a lot of money, because I wanted someone to be with.  I don't think he's taking your needs into consideration.  Friday night and Sunday morning sounds more like dating than marriage. 

If I were you I'd tell him I'm glad he got the job he loves, but you need more time together to be happy. See what it says.  Also, I'd think about if there's a reason he doesn't want to be around me and make sure that he does.

JustKeepsmoving
by Silver Member on Jun. 18, 2017 at 3:36 PM
1 mom liked this
My husband works 90+ hours a week and usually 7 days a week. It's tough sometimes.
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