Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

I think my son might be a sociopath - UPDATED

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 239 Replies

He is 21 years old. 

When he was 8 he threw a puppy across the room and damaged it mentally permanently. He threw boiling water on someone for laughing at him when he was 8. He used to glue lizards to the top of a grill in 100 degree weather and watch them suffer (10yrs old). I've heard stories of him being cruel to animals in other ways. I found out last night that as a child he would jerk his grandmothers dog (8 yrs old) off and was caught a few years ago doing it it a neighbors dog. He's been starting fires for a very long time. He almost burned down the woods nearby and if it had gotten worse would have destroyed several peoples homes and lives (16yrs old). He is an alcoholic, and drug addict. He flies off the handle and talks really crazy, like delusional crazy, he can get extremely violent. I had him in counseling for most of his childhood. He is sweet as pie to my face and loses his shit and freaks out behind my back. The last time he got caught freaking out because I accidentally called him by his brother's name. He has already served over 3 years in prison for stealing cars, wallets and purses. He is back in jail now. He is highly manipulative. He can get people to help him no matter what he does or says. He even got into a fight with his friend, punched him for not coming to jesus, the police were called and everything. That same friend is helping him get money in jail. He even has a preacher and wife going to be a character witness for him. He just started this jesus kick after his parole officer told him he has until X day before he sends him back to prison. He got caught after curfew (like in the middle of the night), didn't go to any meetings and didn't pay any restitution for the entire time he's been out (like 6 months). He even believes he is an angel. For real he believes it. He has no remorse for his crimes against people outside of our family, I have heard he feels bad for some things he has done to us and close family. 

My son in law had a talk with me last night and says I need to cut him from my life until he is clean, sober and out of jail for a couple of years. He only calls for me to go out of my way to help him and for money (I don't give him money). I've heard around town that he's adopted, I'm a drug addict, he was abused as a child, I was mean to him and not the other children...It is both embarrassing and disgusting. I actually called CPS on him as a teen because he was leaving bruises on my youngest son. They didn't do anything because I'm a proper parent, so I sent him to my brother. Anyway, think sil is right but I don't know if I can do it. He wants me to be a character witness to repeal his parole violations. I think the first step is to decline and send all of his stuff to the preacher. I'm so torn. Sorry a bit jumbled. This is really hard. He's my son. How can I turn my back on him?


***A little update. 

Thank you for your replies. Most have been very helpful and supportive.

I have packed up ds stuff and sent a message to the pastor to see if he will hold his stuff for when he got out of jail. Dh and I have talked to our dd and her df about temporarily leaving the property for a few months when he gets out again. They are on board. They can't afford to pay a lot rent, so we'll foot the bill. We have family that owns a campground nearby that ds doesn't know about. Even if he did, there are people a lot more close by than at home. We live in the country, so there isn't any witnesses to anything except the cameras we have.

Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 14, 2017 at 10:11 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 14, 2017 at 10:18 AM

Bump

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jul. 14, 2017 at 10:22 AM
1 mom liked this
Please get him help, if you're not doing so already. That behavior sounds beyond sociopathic. Oh,for some reason I thought you were still dealing with a child.... I don't know what you can do for an adult who is unwilling to help himself.
blue-heart
by Ruby Member on Jul. 14, 2017 at 10:22 AM
Is there someone you can talk to and ask about getting him an evaluation done?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jul. 14, 2017 at 10:23 AM
Yeah....No.
ivegotrhythm
by Platinum Member on Jul. 14, 2017 at 10:27 AM
He's legal adult. What is she supposed to do?

Quoting Anonymous 2: Please get him help, if you're not doing so already. That behavior sounds beyond sociopathic. Oh,for some reason I thought you were still dealing with a child.... I don't know what you can do for an adult who is unwilling to help himself.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Jul. 14, 2017 at 10:27 AM
6 moms liked this
You can be a witness to his parole officer... A witness that encourages a comprehensive psych eval.
my4kids274
by Ruby Member on Jul. 14, 2017 at 10:29 AM
He needs help. Good luck.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Jul. 14, 2017 at 10:29 AM
So where is the complex trauma that would lead to this level of sociopathy because this child was certainly not born this way.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 14, 2017 at 10:31 AM
1 mom liked this

He was born this way. I have 3 other natural kids born and raised same parents, same environment. He was the most difficult child. It was really hard to raise him.

Quoting Anonymous 5: So where is the complex trauma that would lead to this level of sociopathy because this child was certainly not born this way.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 14, 2017 at 10:32 AM

He becomes violent if you meantion for him to get psychological help.

Quoting Anonymous 2: Please get him help, if you're not doing so already. That behavior sounds beyond sociopathic. Oh,for some reason I thought you were still dealing with a child.... I don't know what you can do for an adult who is unwilling to help himself.


Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)