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UPDATE: Church as an "excuse"

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 189 Replies

This is just an update in case anyone cares! lol!

my cousin came with her family to my daughter's party last night. my son and her son kept asking if he could spend the night. she kept saying no. they came to me (in front of her) and said well, if you can do this, then maybe my mom would say yes. i said your mom is sitting right there and she has already said no.

so then after the kids walked away i said "do you just not want them to stay up too late since they stayed up so late last time on a church night?" and she said "that was a church night last time?" and i said "yes". 

then she told me some other stuff that her son has been spending the night a lot at neighbor kids' houses and then during the day he is so tired. she said well, since he doesn't see your son that often, i will allow it.

so she changed her mind! and the kids stayed up alllll night and i was afraid she would be mad but she wasn't. and she truly did not remember that last time was a church night.

i think one moral to the story is that texting sucks and it's hard to read a "tone" and short sentence. also, not everyone remembers every little detail like i do and she just didn't remember before that it was a church night before, and three it's just not a big deal but i try hard for my kids to see their cousins 3-5 times per year but soemtimes it works and sometimes it doesn't but i know that i need to get better at not letting things annoy me so much. 



This is just a rant, but if someone would like to tell me another positive way to think about, feel free!

But I have had this happen so many times that my kids' friends and cousins have spent the night on a Saturday night at our house or at their houses. But then sometimes, the parents say "oh sorry, we have church in the morning so that won't work."

It makes me want to say how did it work other times on a saturday night for them to spend the night at each other's houses before?

but oh don't you dare question someone! 

my SIL said they have been missing too much church lately so the cousins can't spend the night for my son's birthday party. So they could miss church for other things but can't miss church for my son's party??

my cousin just said her son can't spend the night because they have church sunday morning but last month my son spent the night at their house on a saturday night and stayed up until 3AM and they still went to church!

What is it about this darn excuse? It really pisses me off if you can't tell! Like I said, tell me something to think of it a different way because I would rather focus on positive than negative but this shit pisses me off!

Edit: also, would you say something to someone (like a famly member)? like why was it okay before? or something like that. in my experience in life, that never goes over well. i just get "punished" somehow or they act like a b*tch because how dare i question their decision!!

Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 14, 2017 at 4:16 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 14, 2017 at 4:17 PM

.

Pink.Sunshine
by Petty Princess on Jul. 14, 2017 at 4:18 PM
5 moms liked this
I'm glad I'm not obligated to spend majority of my Sunday in church anymore. It's lovely
Southern_Song
by Jo on Jul. 14, 2017 at 4:18 PM
We don't do the church thing and we ignore people who use it as an excuse. Hopefully they repent while avoiding on their couch.
redbottoms
by Ruby Member on Jul. 14, 2017 at 4:19 PM
yeah its annoying but it is what it is. They might not be that into you or whatever. Find someone else that is more willing to hang out.

and maybe plan sleepovers on friday night from now on
TinkTink205
by Gold Member on Jul. 14, 2017 at 4:19 PM

I don't know.  My kids miss church for sleepovers.  Bump.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 14, 2017 at 4:20 PM
2 moms liked this

all of my daughter's friends have church on sunday morning but they are all spending the night for her bday party. when you really want to allow your kid to do something, you will. 

Quoting Southern_Song: We don't do the church thing and we ignore people who use it as an excuse. Hopefully they repent while avoiding on their couch.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 14, 2017 at 4:21 PM

not being that into me is not the case here. all the cousins love each other and all get along and have so much fun together. i try to do bday parties on saturdays mostly because of most people working on fridays all day and not wanting them to have to hurry up and get home from work to bring their kid to a bday party.

Quoting redbottoms: yeah its annoying but it is what it is. They might not be that into you or whatever. Find someone else that is more willing to hang out. and maybe plan sleepovers on friday night from now on


hart57
by Ruby Member on Jul. 14, 2017 at 4:21 PM
You can offer they bring him for dinner and some play time than pick him up.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 14, 2017 at 4:22 PM
1 mom liked this

we don't go to church, but if we did, i don't think i would be using it as an excuse when i just let them miss church before or still spend the night and stay up really late and still go to church.


Quoting Southern_Song: We don't do the church thing and we ignore people who use it as an excuse. Hopefully they repent while avoiding on their couch.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jul. 14, 2017 at 4:23 PM

I would assume if they church-goer is at home for the sleep over, they can still go to church in the morning. They maybe feel like if the church-goer is not at home Sunday morning, it makes it harder to get to church in the morning. Or they are just using it as an excuse and it's not the real reason.

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