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Recently divorced...is it normal to feel this way?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
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Hey all. My marriage of nearly 10 years ended in December and the divorce was finalized in spring. We've both dated some, but my ex husband has recently become serious with someone. I've met her and she is great. My kids really like her, too. We've also discussed that I am mom, she is not, but I want her to be there for my kids and a good role model for them which she is on board for. There are no hard feelings at all; this is really the ideal situation - we all get along (for the most part, my ex and I have our days) and my ex and I coparent pretty well. Quick and easy divorce, no issues with custody (50/50), no battle of finances, etc. Even though our situtation is as best as it can be for divorced families, I can't help but feel sadness in the sense that there is someone else stepping into that motherly figure role for my kids when they're with their dad and I'm not there. She's not trying to be their mom or replace me, but every now and then the "omg I'm being replaced and my kids will love her more than me" thoughts pop up in my head. Is this normal? I really don't like feeling this way, especially since I love my step mother like my own mom, but the thought of my kids feeling that way for someone else kills me a little inside. Any advice? Will these feelings pass? 


Btw, myself and my kids are in counseling, the split was mutual. It just wasn't working and our relationship as well as our kids' well being are much healthier this way.

Posted by Anonymous on Aug. 8, 2017 at 5:45 PM
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PJMM
by Ruby Member on Aug. 8, 2017 at 5:51 PM
I'm sure it's normal. I have never dealt with a sm so idk if they pass but they might get better as you realize her role better and become more secure with her. It's not replacing you it's having help to raise your child is how I'd see it.
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