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My marriage is falling apart

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 175 Replies

when my dh and I got together we both had a dd from a previous relationship. I was clear I wanted 2 more kids. Well we now have an almost 3 yr old son and my dh has decided he doesn't want anymore. He claims he agreed to one more and said maybe on the second. I disagree but it doesn't reallly matter. I have tried to get over it for months. Be ok with the children we have but I just can't. I can't help but resent him for not giving me one more child. I can't have sex with him without thinking about it and it just upsets me. Any time we argue I feel like it's going to just come back to the fact that he won't give me another baby.

His reasoning is I have difficult pregnancies, while true it's not the end of the world and really it's me who has to deal with it. Also money, I sah and my dh makes plenty and we recently moved to Texas so much lower cost of living (we moved from right outside Portland, or) 

i just don't know what to do. We don't really have any other problems but I can't let this go. I think it may end my marriage. Any advice or anyone else been in this situation?

Posted by Anonymous on Aug. 17, 2017 at 2:41 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Aug. 17, 2017 at 2:45 PM

Bump

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Aug. 17, 2017 at 2:47 PM

Bump

bonnie333
by Silver Member on Aug. 17, 2017 at 2:49 PM
6 moms liked this
Figure out a way to deal with it. Only seeing my kids half the time would kill me more than not having another one.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Aug. 17, 2017 at 2:49 PM
9 moms liked this
His reasons seem legit. Get over yourself and find a hobby.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Aug. 17, 2017 at 2:50 PM

That is a good point, I have tried almost a year to get over it. I just can't seem to do it.

Quoting Anonymous 2: Figure out a way to deal with it. Only seeing my kids half the time would kill me more than not having another one.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Aug. 17, 2017 at 2:50 PM

The difficult pregnancies part is, but he makes plenty of money for another child.

Quoting Anonymous 3: His reasons seem legit. Get over yourself and find a hobby.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Aug. 17, 2017 at 2:50 PM
5 moms liked this
Put your 3 year old in preschool and get a job. Who would want to be the sole breadwinner for 4 kids?
JalynSpoon
by CajunTarHeel on Aug. 17, 2017 at 2:51 PM
9 moms liked this

So, you have difficult pregnancies & he is wants his wife around instead of burying her, but yet you want to leave him?

What if you die? He is left alone with raising the kids. Do you think about anyone else but yourself?

quinnsmom715
by Ruby Member on Aug. 17, 2017 at 2:51 PM
2 moms liked this

well,whats more important..this 'dream' of another child or a happy marriage?what about the kids you already have?

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Aug. 17, 2017 at 2:52 PM

Lots of men. And I'm getting HIS masters degree for him. So I'm doing school full time at the moment. Which of course he has no problem having me do but doesn't want to do what makes me happy. His dd is in Oregon so he's not sole breadwinner for her. He pays half of everything for her.

Quoting Anonymous 4: Put your 3 year old in preschool and get a job. Who would want to be the sole breadwinner for 4 kids?


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