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I told DH I want a divorce

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
It's been a difficult couple of days. I never thought this would happen. I never thought I would want a divorce. We had our 11 year anniversary last month. I've been sick trying to tell him that I'm unhappy. I've been trying for years to get through, I've been trying for years to feel happy and content and keep my family together. I got him to try counseling once But he didn't want to do it anymore. I just can't make it work anymore. I feel selfish. I feel terrible. But the only reason I could come up with to stay is to keep him and the children happy.

I don't know why I'm posting this. I just needed to say it, I guess. I don't really talk to anyone about my personal life.
Posted by Anonymous on Sep. 14, 2017 at 2:06 AM
Replies (21-24):
littlesippycup
by Baby T-rex Arms on Sep. 17, 2017 at 6:28 PM
That's a hard place to be. I wish you good luck for happiness.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Sep. 20, 2017 at 12:47 AM
He was shocked. He wasn't expecting it. I understand why... I have devoted myself to his happiness for years, while pushing my happiness aside. I know it's not fair to come to him with a divorce when he was so oblivious. That's on me. I told him I know it's not fair for me to hit him out of the blue like that. But I can't change how I feel. I can't be happy with him. I love him as the father to my children, but I don't love him as my husband anymore.

I've been thinking about all of it all week, and I stand by what I want - a divorce. Sometimes you just can't look at someone the same way anymore once your vision of them has changed. I know that's my fault. I know it.

This past week he's been drunk, held a gun in his mouth, accused me three times of cheating, acted as though we can work through it, wanted to talk every day... it's been tumultuous.

Quoting Anonymous 11:

What did he say?

hotspice58
by Platinum Member on Sep. 20, 2017 at 12:51 AM
This.

Quoting Anonymous 5: Peace is so much better than staying in a place where you're miserable. It's not your fault. You tried. Hugs
Anonymous
by Anonymous 11 on Sep. 20, 2017 at 1:09 AM

People change and thats not your fault. i look at my dh differently a lot lately. I understand. If the gun thing happens again or he threatens suicide in any way get him a 72 hour hold. dont let him play those games. 

Quoting Anonymous 1: He was shocked. He wasn't expecting it. I understand why... I have devoted myself to his happiness for years, while pushing my happiness aside. I know it's not fair to come to him with a divorce when he was so oblivious. That's on me. I told him I know it's not fair for me to hit him out of the blue like that. But I can't change how I feel. I can't be happy with him. I love him as the father to my children, but I don't love him as my husband anymore. I've been thinking about all of it all week, and I stand by what I want - a divorce. Sometimes you just can't look at someone the same way anymore once your vision of them has changed. I know that's my fault. I know it. This past week he's been drunk, held a gun in his mouth, accused me three times of cheating, acted as though we can work through it, wanted to talk every day... it's been tumultuous.
Quoting Anonymous 11:

What did he say?


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