Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Culture and giving birth or adoption. A question

Posted by on Oct. 19, 2017 at 8:04 AM
  • 69 Replies
In this culture and many other cultures people will ask why do you adopt but not why do you give birth. People look at you strangely when you say your first choice is adoption. Is that because this is not the norm? What do you think?
by on Oct. 19, 2017 at 8:04 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
Kmary
by Platinum Member on Oct. 19, 2017 at 8:09 AM
2 moms liked this

I think adoption is beautiful.   My dh was adopted and he feels like the luckiest guy on the planet.  But I actually think wanting to reproduce in the traditional way is an inherent natural desire.  Just a part of our DNA.  It's the reason that animals try to reproduce as much as possible.  Surviival of the species is just a natural part of being a mammal. 

Lifeisajoy9
by Bronze Member on Oct. 19, 2017 at 8:10 AM
That is so awesome about your dh. Thank you for that perspective. Very neat way to look at it.

Quoting Kmary:

I think adoption is beautiful.   My dh was adopted and he feels like the luckiest guy on the planet.  But I actually think wanting to reproduce in the traditional way is an inherent natural desire.  Just a part of our DNA.  It's the reason that animals try to reproduce as much as possible.  Surviival of the species is just a natural part of being a mammal. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Oct. 19, 2017 at 8:11 AM
2 moms liked this
Most people are able to reproduce and that's the natural order of things. I'm not sure why people would look at you strangely for adopting but I understand why people don't ask "why do you give birt".
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Oct. 19, 2017 at 8:11 AM
1 mom liked this
I don't support adoption. I was adopted.
Lifeisajoy9
by Bronze Member on Oct. 19, 2017 at 8:12 AM
Reasoning?

Quoting Anonymous 2: I don't support adoption. I was adopted.
Lifeisajoy9
by Bronze Member on Oct. 19, 2017 at 8:13 AM
1 mom liked this
They look at you strangely when you say your first choice was adoption. Not so much if you could not reproduce then adopt

Quoting Anonymous 1: Most people are able to reproduce and that's the natural order of things. I'm not sure why people would look at you strangely for adopting but I understand why people don't ask "why do you give birt".
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Oct. 19, 2017 at 8:16 AM
1 mom liked this
It's much more common for people to have their own biological children, either before adopting or only. Typically, when a couple adopts, it's because they haven't been able to have biological children. People judge or question what they don't know understand. It can be difficult to understand something you don't feel yourself.
StonesGirl66
by Alexandra on Oct. 19, 2017 at 8:17 AM
2 moms liked this
Why did I give birth? Because DH and I wanted children. We never considered adopting. Only if a minor family member lost their parents we would definately want to oversee the care and raising of the child. That's it.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Oct. 19, 2017 at 8:18 AM
Because my mother was coerced into it.
We are a family now but I had to wait till my 18th birthday. Ive never looked back either.

Quoting Lifeisajoy9: Reasoning?

Quoting Anonymous 2: I don't support adoption. I was adopted.
Lifeisajoy9
by Bronze Member on Oct. 19, 2017 at 8:31 AM
1 mom liked this
Sorry to hear that but that is not for every adoption.

Quoting Anonymous 2: Because my mother was coerced into it.
We are a family now but I had to wait till my 18th birthday. Ive never looked back either.

Quoting Lifeisajoy9: Reasoning?

Quoting Anonymous 2: I don't support adoption. I was adopted.
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)