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My dad was 61 when I was born, AMA

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 11 Replies
Tonight someone told me it was selfish for him to have a child at such an old age. This was not the first time a person has called my deceased father selfish for his choices.

It made me realize people don’t understand the situation at all. So ask me anything :)
Posted by Anonymous on Oct. 19, 2017 at 11:07 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Oct. 19, 2017 at 11:19 PM
How much younger than him was your mother? Was she his first wife? Did you have any siblings or half siblings? Was he active with your school and extracurriculars? How old were you when he passed?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 19, 2017 at 11:26 PM
25 year difference.

No

I have 2 older half siblings but I have only met them a handful of times when my dad was near the end of his life and when he passed.

Yes he was active in everything I did. He and my mom divorced when I was 14 but he still came to every event and we spent every Saturday together. I lived with him when I turned 17 until he passed away when I was 18.



Quoting Anonymous 2: How much younger than him was your mother? Was she his first wife? Did you have any siblings or half siblings? Was he active with your school and extracurriculars? How old were you when he passed?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Oct. 19, 2017 at 11:32 PM
So, your mom wasn't super young when you were born either. How did your parents meet? Did your dad have a lot of money? Was he still working or retired when you were born? Is your DH much older than you? Did your mom remarry after their divorce? Was her next husband much older? Did the age difference contribute to your parents' divorce? Are you sorry your kids didn't get to meet him?

Quoting Anonymous 1: 25 year difference.

No

I have 2 older half siblings but I have only met them a handful of times when my dad was near the end of his life and when he passed.

Yes he was active in everything I did. He and my mom divorced when I was 14 but he still came to every event and we spent every Saturday together. I lived with him when I turned 17 until he passed away when I was 18.



Quoting Anonymous 2: How much younger than him was your mother? Was she his first wife? Did you have any siblings or half siblings? Was he active with your school and extracurriculars? How old were you when he passed?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Oct. 19, 2017 at 11:44 PM
Why do you believe his decision to have you wasn’t selfish? (Assuming you were planned)
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Oct. 19, 2017 at 11:48 PM
Do you know if you were planned?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 19, 2017 at 11:54 PM
They lived in the same small rural town. She owns a pharmacy there. He was a contractor. He made more than her but not much. He was still working when I was born but not throughout most of my childhood.

My husband is 2 years older. She is not married but she’s been with her boyfriend for 10 years now. He is her age, just a few months older.

I don’t think so. It wasn’t a case of she wanted to be young and free. She’s always been a boring old lady at heart lol they just grew apart.


Yes I wish my children would have met him! He always loved children and was such a good role model in our community.

Quoting Anonymous 2: So, your mom wasn't super young when you were born either. How did your parents meet? Did your dad have a lot of money? Was he still working or retired when you were born? Is your DH much older than you? Did your mom remarry after their divorce? Was her next husband much older? Did the age difference contribute to your parents' divorce? Are you sorry your kids didn't get to meet him?

Quoting Anonymous 1: 25 year difference.

No

I have 2 older half siblings but I have only met them a handful of times when my dad was near the end of his life and when he passed.

Yes he was active in everything I did. He and my mom divorced when I was 14 but he still came to every event and we spent every Saturday together. I lived with him when I turned 17 until he passed away when I was 18.



Quoting Anonymous 2: How much younger than him was your mother? Was she his first wife? Did you have any siblings or half siblings? Was he active with your school and extracurriculars? How old were you when he passed?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 19, 2017 at 11:57 PM
I just don’t think his age was a reflection of who he was as a person. He didn’t make selfish choices. He did everything for my mom and I even after their divorce. He wasn’t selfish, he already had kids that he raised, my mom wanted to have a child and so they did.

The father he was during those 18 years was more than some people get in 60 years. I don’t feel robbed of anything.

Quoting Anonymous 3: Why do you believe his decision to have you wasn’t selfish? (Assuming you were planned)
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 19, 2017 at 11:58 PM
Yes I was planned. My mom’s only child :)

Quoting Anonymous 4: Do you know if you were planned?
QUEENGLITTER
by on Oct. 20, 2017 at 12:04 AM

Some people can spend their whole life not being loved by a parent and you have been loved by both. No questions.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 20, 2017 at 12:14 AM
1 mom liked this
Very true

Quoting QUEENGLITTER:

Some people can spend their whole life not being loved by a parent and you have been loved by both. No questions.

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