Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Spin off "I don't do babies"

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 140 Replies
2 moms liked this
Kind of not really. The troll crap was just the same old stupid you see on here a the time. But the title made me think of myself.

I truly don't like babies. I love kids once they are out of diapers, no longer on the bottle and can communicate clearly. But babies just get on my last nerve. I never had any desire to have my own. Ever. But when I married my husband he wanted kids so badly I gave in in in condition - he was the primary caregiver until they were out of diapers and off the bottle. I wanted nothing to do with night feedings. Walking the floor with a crying baby. Dealing with baby puke. None of it.

I worked until I went into labor with both of them. I went back to work as soon as I physically could. He took on the caretaker role and he was great at it. I never changed a diaper. Never fed them. Never did any of the baby care. Sometimes I would hold them for a little while when I got home but of they pooped or for hungry or fussy they we're all his.

I know people are going to jump all over me for this but they are in their teens now and we have are very close. We didn't have much of a bond until they were in school but over time I became more involved and that bond developed. They way we did it worked for my family.

My husband has no regrets or resentment either. He has said he is glad we compromised. He got to be a dad. I didn't have to do things I would have hated and resented. I was able to develop those bonds with my kids because I hadn't had that resentment when they were babies. And he actually enjoyed doing those things.

Posted by Anonymous on Oct. 21, 2017 at 12:01 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
Pisces_Mom89
by Silver Member on Oct. 21, 2017 at 12:07 PM
5 moms liked this

 I dont understand how someone doesnt like babies.

Tinse
by Crazy Bird Lady on Oct. 21, 2017 at 12:10 PM
1 mom liked this

I'm not going to jump all over you at all.

In fact, kudos to you for having married such a gem of a man!

I'm sure you deserve each other, of course.  I'm being sincere and honest.

I am a bio-mom and couldn't imagine all the diaper changes, strict feeding regimens, etc.

To this day, I have never changed a diaper.  Can you believe it!

I'm glad everything worked out the way it did. :)

Tinse
by Crazy Bird Lady on Oct. 21, 2017 at 12:12 PM

It isn't so much, I think, that the OP, and me, for that matter, do not like babies.

It's more that we dislike the unpleasant tasks associated with caring for babies, such as the diaper changes, the feeding, crying at various times during the night, etc.

I know that must sound immature to many here, but it is what it is for some of us.

Quoting Pisces_Mom89:

 I dont understand how someone doesnt like babies.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Oct. 21, 2017 at 12:12 PM
1 mom liked this
Whatever works. Tons of women perform the caretaking role while dads do what you did. A co-worker of dh's did the same thing. He wanted one more, the wife didn't, and he managed to talk her into it by taking the responsibilty for the hard parts.
PeanutsGma
by Silver Member on Oct. 21, 2017 at 12:14 PM
3 moms liked this
Here's the thing, there is no right or wrong way - you chose the best way for YOU - so applause, applause from me!

My late husband was horrible with our boys when they were babies, he couldn't handle the messy that babies are - saw the man gag when I made rice cereal, LOL - and then I watched how his mother was with them, and it made complete sense.

As long as the children are thriving, as long as the parents are good with the arrangement, no one else should matter.

SpiritedWitch
by Froggie on Oct. 21, 2017 at 12:15 PM

I don't do kids. I loved our son but if circumstances would have been different, I would not have had any kids. I don't know if we would have still been together or not, but there would not have been kids. As it stands, I refused to have anymore ... no matter what. 

SpiritedWitch
by Froggie on Oct. 21, 2017 at 12:17 PM
2 moms liked this

What's not to understand? There are women that do not like or even want to be around the screaming poop machines. It would be nice if we could just skip that horrible needy stage.

Quoting Pisces_Mom89:

 I dont understand how someone doesnt like babies.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 21, 2017 at 12:17 PM
1 mom liked this
He's awesome. He really is a nurterer and a caretaker and I'm just not. He actually ended up going to nursing school once the kids got into school and it suits him perfectly.

Quoting Tinse:

I'm not going to jump all over you at all.

In fact, kudos to you for having married such a gem of a man!

I'm sure you deserve each other, of course.  I'm being sincere and honest.

I am a bio-mom and couldn't imagine all the diaper changes, strict feeding regimens, etc.

To this day, I have never changed a diaper.  Can you believe it!

I'm glad everything worked out the way it did. :)

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 21, 2017 at 12:18 PM
Yes that's very true. And if he hadn't been so wonderful about keeping his side of the deal there would not have been a second child.

Quoting Anonymous 2: Whatever works. Tons of women perform the caretaking role while dads do what you did. A co-worker of dh's did the same thing. He wanted one more, the wife didn't, and he managed to talk her into it by taking the responsibilty for the hard parts.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Oct. 21, 2017 at 12:18 PM
1 mom liked this
Meh. Its not the best age but I thought of it like an investment. Putting the time and effort into baby/toddler/kid/teen would enrich and teach me lots of things I wouldnt otherwise learn.
Being a mom to a very challenging child has made me a better person.
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)