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Your life is based on the choices you make

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 77 Replies
Does everyone believe this is always true? Is there ever a circumstance beyond ones control that would take choices away? Or what about "rock and a hard place" choices? Have you ever been in a situation where you had no viable choices?
Posted by Anonymous on Oct. 23, 2017 at 12:05 PM
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MonarchMom22
by Bronze Member on Oct. 23, 2017 at 12:06 PM
4 moms liked this

I believe the only thing we have control over is our choices - how to react, or not to react. What we say or do, whether or not we let someone else make decisions for us or limit us.

Circumstances are usually not under our control. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Oct. 23, 2017 at 12:08 PM
Well....you're neglecting to mention your lives direction is very much affected by the circumstances they are born into.

Take for instance thee people. A girl born into a poor polygamist cult. A ministry girl born into the projects, poor...abused and neglected. A white boy born to well off professionals. Say all three want to be a doctor. Who is it going g to come easier to at every step of the way?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Oct. 23, 2017 at 12:09 PM

I didn't make the choice to have 2 types of Arthritis, chronic fatigue syndrome, fibromyalgia. I had goals and ambitions, now I'm stuck inside and not able to take care of things. I depend on a husband who doesn't give a shit either, my life in no longer in my control. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Oct. 23, 2017 at 12:11 PM
Some people get put behind the 8 ball through no fault of their own.

Others make poor choices and ignore sound advice.

It truly depends on each situation.
notjstasocermom
by Sapphire Member on Oct. 23, 2017 at 12:12 PM
For the most part yes
Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Oct. 23, 2017 at 12:12 PM
2 moms liked this
Kind of, my exdh was very abusive. He left our two kids and me for another woman. I couldn't get assistance since we were legally married. I had to get a letter from him saying he moved out and was not paying CS. He of course refused so I worked 1 full time job and 3 part time jobs. His SM and father watched our kids. I was barely able to keep my head above water even working 7 days a weeks 12+ hrs a day. I am not proud of it but I sold weed for a short time and stole food a few times. This was 18 years ago, I still feel bad when I think about it.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 6 on Oct. 23, 2017 at 12:15 PM

Of course there are circumstances that can take away your choices. I could be hit by a drunk driver tomorrow and be killed. That would have nothing to do with the choices I made (unless you want to argue my getting in my car to go to the grocery store had something to do with it). It would affect all my choices going forward, lol.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 7 on Oct. 23, 2017 at 12:15 PM
1 mom liked this

Your starting point affects the options you have, and the choices you make. 

I grew up upper-middle-class, the options I had were vastly different to those available to kids who grew up in blue-collar households, and those kids had vastly different options than the kids who grew up poor.

Traci_Momof2
by Ruby Member on Oct. 23, 2017 at 12:15 PM

I think most of the time it's true.  There are some things where it isn't, such as being laid off from work, or house burning down, but even those kinds of situations which are out of your control, they present a new set of choices that are within your control and will shape which path your future goes down.

So I guess, yeah, there are always things that happen that are beyond our control, but we are still in control of how we deal with them and how we react to them.  Therefore I am never a fan of playing victim and crying "woe is me, life dealt me a crappy hand, my life will never be great".  Well if you CHOOSE to carry on that attitude then you are right, life never will be great.  But that still comes down to your choice.

MissTuree
by Platinum Member on Oct. 23, 2017 at 12:16 PM
I think there's 2 things in life choices and luck. I mean luck in the least hocus locus way possible. My ex went to medical school and graduated. He failed his licensing exam that would allow him to start his residency. He began trying to find work outside of the medical field. He ended up getting an extremely good job, very high up in an well known organization. He had NO business getting that job. He is a very smart man, and charismatic, so I knew as long as he got face to face with the interviewers he'd have a great shot. Sure enough he got it. He would try to act like he got where he is in life purely because he made all the right choices and was just the hardest working man ever. (His arrogance is a reason we are no longer together) I would have to remind him that while, yes, he was a hard worker and very smart he was LUCKY. He had no business getting that job and it was completely by chance he was able to fail his licensing exam and end up in a position to be making 10-fold what his fellow med school peers were making.
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