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Is this normal? Help me understand.

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 59 Replies
My brother and sil are due to have their third baby soon. I just found out that not only does she not want visitors while she's in labor, she doesn't want anyone to sit in the waiting room to wait for the baby to be born. She doesn't want anyone to visit the baby in the hospital once she's born and she doesn't want anyone to come over for a few days after they get home.

Now it's not just our side she doesn't want there, she doesn't want her family there either. No one is asking to be in the delivery room so I'm not sure why the waiting room is also off limits.

She had visitors during labor and after delivery with her first two and I've never known anyone else to want this. She won't say why just that it's what she wants. My brother is respecting her wishes.
Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 20, 2017 at 6:58 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Nov. 20, 2017 at 7:00 AM
6 moms liked this

She doesn't want family stressing her out and wants them to just enjoy time as their little family before everyone starts hounding in on them. What's the big deal?

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Nov. 20, 2017 at 7:01 AM
2 moms liked this
Are there any concerns that there are complications with this baby? Do you think she could have felt overwhelmed with the number of visitors for the last two babies and is trying to eliminate this as a possibility?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Nov. 20, 2017 at 7:01 AM
3 moms liked this

Everyone should respect her wishes.  Her delivery, her baby, her hospital stay, her home, her choices her way.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Nov. 20, 2017 at 7:02 AM
1 mom liked this

Labor can be a physically and emoptionally exhausting experience.  I am with her- I would not want a string of visitors while I am trying to push out a baby, except my SO.  That, and after the birth, I don't want to have to deal with anyone except my SO while I am recovering from giving birth and bonding with my new baby.  Sorry, I just don't want to deal with you.

mcginnisc
by *Claire-Bear* on Nov. 20, 2017 at 7:04 AM
5 moms liked this

Does normalcy matter? If she is asking for privacy- she should get it. There is nothing wrong with what she is asking and everyone needs to respect her and your brother's wishes. This is about THEM and their family- NOT making everyone else in the family happy. 

Claire


" I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Philippians 4:13 

Mom2theboy1994
by Gold Member on Nov. 20, 2017 at 7:04 AM
1 mom liked this
Honestly? Had I had the balls to do it, I would have made the same request. But I was very young and thought having a million people there and coming in and out was the norm. The idea of having complete calm in the hospital and at home for a few days before visitors sounds awesome.

I can't say if it's normal or not, but if I had it to do over again, it would be me and my husband and that's it for at least a week.
merrysgirls
by Lame on Nov. 20, 2017 at 7:04 AM
1 mom liked this
I think it’s normal. Visitors are stressful and having a brand new baby is a time you want to enjoy and keep low key. Especially with it being her third. I totally get where she’s coming from and you all should respect it.

It won’t kill anyone to wait an extra three days.
Lindalou907
by Gold Member on Nov. 20, 2017 at 7:04 AM
2 moms liked this

It's not abnormal, she's feeling overwhelmed, ask her how you can help. Offer to babysit the other kids, take them to your place, come back with a casserole.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 6 on Nov. 20, 2017 at 7:04 AM

Maybe she is feeling uneasy about leaving her older two at home.  Who is watching her kids while she is giving birth?

lucky2Beeme
by Emerald Member on Nov. 20, 2017 at 7:05 AM
It's normal for them.
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