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DH told my daughter that marrying me was a poor life decision

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 58 Replies
He's DD's stepfather.

I basically said that what I was thankful for was that he chose me. That I don't know why he did, but I'll be forever grateful for it.

He responded that we should call it what it is: a poor life decision. And then he laughed. I told him that what he was supposed to say was that I'm the love of his life and he couldn't imagine living without me. He replied that it was an empirically poor life decision. No newly graduated kid should ask himself what he's going to do with his life and answer that he's going to marry an IHOP waitress with a kid and a litigious ex-husband.

Now DD thinks we don't really love each other. She claimed if we didn't have kids together we'd have divorced a long time ago. Which couldn't be further from the truth. But try convincing her that now that he talked out of his ass like that.

ETA: I had a talk with him. He said it was a poor choice of words, but now that DD's only six years younger than he was when he met me, he knows for sure he would think she was throwing her life away if she made a similar match to someone so much older, someone still getting established and with a kid. That it worked out for the two of us, but it's very unusual that it worked out. And the first seven years of our marriage were harder than if we'd waited for him to pay off his student loans and me to finish my degree.
Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 23, 2017 at 6:53 PM
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Replies (1-10):
vegaswife2011
by LMAO on Nov. 23, 2017 at 6:55 PM
Sad.
lipsis
by Sapphire Member on Nov. 23, 2017 at 6:55 PM
How long have you been married?

My husband has a weird sense of humor, so I could see him saying this and think he was hilarious. But he wouldn't say it in front of the kids. He'd know better.
corticosteroid
by Sapphire Member on Nov. 23, 2017 at 6:55 PM

It doesn’t sound like he loves you...

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Nov. 23, 2017 at 6:56 PM
1 mom liked this

Maybe he really feels that way.

I probably would be questioning why I would stay with someone who said those types of thing.  Self Esteem

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Nov. 23, 2017 at 6:56 PM
Well he says what he feels
young_lv_mom
by Gold Member on Nov. 23, 2017 at 6:56 PM
2 moms liked this
Are you sure he was talking out of his ass? He could have been fully honest about it. No matter what it was a dick move and hopefully your day gets better.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Nov. 23, 2017 at 6:57 PM
Ten years. DD's 16.

Quoting lipsis: How long have you been married?

My husband has a weird sense of humor, so I could see him saying this and think he was hilarious. But he wouldn't say it in front of the kids. He'd know better.
iampavlov
by RingTheBell on Nov. 23, 2017 at 6:58 PM
4 moms liked this

many a truth is said in jest

quinnsmom715
by Ruby Member on Nov. 23, 2017 at 6:58 PM
1 mom liked this

thats a HORRIBLE thing to say..

disneymom2two
by Ruby Member on Nov. 23, 2017 at 6:58 PM

That was really crappy of him.  I'd definitely have some words for him.

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