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I'm not quitting my job

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 196 Replies
1 mom liked this
We just ended up with full custody of my sks. They are 3 and 5. Their Mom is in patient and could be for quite some ti.e and it is doubtful that she will ever be able to take on the responsibility of being a full time pareent when she gets out. She has been living with her parents and they have been doing the majority of the child care during her time.

Anyway, I understand the best thing for the kids is to live with us full time and of course that's fine with me. But dh and I both work full time. His kids have never been in daycare or after school care before. Even when they were with us, her Mom provided childcare when we worked. She is not willing to continue. Which I understand. It's a lot.

Dh is uncomfortable putting them in daycare or after school care right now. He says they have already gone through too many changes and are having too hard of a time missing their Mom and not understanding what's happening. He makes about 3 times what I do and he has said that the best way I can help our family is to quit my job and stay home with his kids. I love my job. I don't like being a sahm. I never have. I have worked my entire life - including when my own kids were little. I told him no, I'm unwilling to make that sacrifice. I'm not the biggest fan of small children as it is and in order to make taking this on full time and stay sane I NEED my job. It isn't about the money to me.

Now dh is angry and trying to guilt me into changing my mind but I won't. I have done research into daycares and given an all the information. He needs to pick one and get over it. The kids will be fine.
Posted by Anonymous on Dec. 17, 2017 at 5:00 PM
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Replies (1-10):
engagedandproud
by Diamond Member on Dec. 17, 2017 at 5:02 PM
2 moms liked this
I agree with you
WickedPissah
by awestomy on Dec. 17, 2017 at 5:05 PM
I don't blame you.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Dec. 17, 2017 at 5:07 PM
16 moms liked this

What about hiring a nanny that can focus entirely on them, enable them to be home and take them to activities/therapy/etc.

mmm2015
by Eldouchedegrande on Dec. 17, 2017 at 5:08 PM
2 moms liked this

he can hire a nanny


JRP14
by Silver Member on Dec. 17, 2017 at 5:08 PM
I agree with you.
JulyBabies
by Platinum Member on Dec. 17, 2017 at 5:08 PM
4 moms liked this

Considering you worked when your own kids were young, it should be clear to him that this is not to slight him or his children. Sounds like you are sympathetic to his situation and are helping to find solutions regarding daycare, not much more you can do. 

VickyJoJo
by Gold Member on Dec. 17, 2017 at 5:10 PM

I agree with you.  You know yourself and if you are not happy, these children will know it and create more problems.  In fact, settling into a set routine will help them adjust.

ETA: I do like what another poster suggested-a nanny might work better in the short term.

nanny1918
by Ruby Member on Dec. 17, 2017 at 5:10 PM
I agree with you.
jules2boys
by on Dec. 17, 2017 at 5:11 PM
What about a nanny?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 17, 2017 at 5:11 PM
That's also possible though I don't know if it would realistically be in the budget.

Quoting Anonymous 2:

What about hiring a nanny that can focus entirely on them, enable them to be home and take them to activities/therapy/etc.

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